Pain can lead to Love
by LittleWonderland
Summary: A close call with death leaves a severely depressed Gray being admitted to hospital. It's here he encounters his childhood friend, Lucy, whom he hasn't seen in years. Only problem is, she no longer remembers him. So it's up to Gray to make her remember and up to Lucy to prove that pain really can lead to love. Warnings: Self harm, language. Rated M for later chapters. AU, OOC. xx
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Fairy Tail or its characters. I simply wish I did :)

**Hello!  
I'm starting my third FanFic already. I really should focus on writing just one or two since I know that if I write too many I won't be able to focus and I'll just end up neglecting the majority of my stories.  
Yeah, well anyway...I'm gonna stop rambling now.  
Remember to read and review! It inspires me to write more and helps me to improve.**

xxxx

_Pain can lead to Love_

Chapter 1: Out of Hand

Gray's POV

Gray was shaking uncontrollably, unsure of exactly what was going on.

What the hell had he just done?

There was blood everywhere. Dripping down his arm and seeping from the fresh cuts on his wrists. He tore multiple tissues from their box and held them against his bloody wrist.

The blood wouldn't stop. It just kept on oozing out, no matter how many tissues he went through. It was bleeding profusely and even dripping onto the

bathroom floor.  
He grit his teeth in an attempt to try and ignore the growing pain in his arm. He'd promised himself that he'd never let this get out of hand. He thought he could control it, thought that he could be the exception to the rule.

This is how they all feel. Everyone who has ever self-harmed thinks that they can beat this. Gray was no exception.

He'd started off small and shallow, with barely any blood at all. And he never cut more than once a week.

It was a way of releasing his emotions. Focusing on physical pain instead of the mental pain.

But as his mental and emotional pain gradually got worse, so did the cutting. The cutting became more frequent and a whole lot deeper than intended.

Now it was at the point where Gray had cut too deep. He could see the horrors inside his arm and he knew the moment he laid eyes on it that it would scar him for life. Not just physically, but mentally as well.

His breath was coming in short, sharp pants and he was starting to feel light-headed.

_"Oh shit!"_ He thought to himself, _"I'm actually going to...die."  
_

He was clutching his wrist desperately; his body was almost doubled over on the floor. The pain was horrific. It had never hurt so much before.

Gray was gasping, tears forming in his eyes. With what little strength he had left he started to call out the names of his flat-mates. _  
_

"ERZA! NATSU!" he called out to them, desperation obvious in his voice, "HELP!"

The bathroom door burst open as girl with long red haired girl stalked in, "What the hell do you want?" She asked before looking down at her friend who sat on the ground, crying and covered in blood, "Oh shit! Gray what's happened?"

Gray didn't answer as Erza removed the wad of bloody tissues from his wrist. She gasped in shock and had to force herself not to topple over backwards.

Gray's wrist was a bloody mess. Thick, gaping cuts made their way from his wrist and all the way up his forearm. She could even make out some scars from previous experiences underneath all the mess on his arm.

"Gray..." she whispered sadly, as tears began to leak from her eyes.

Holding Gray's bloody arm in one hand and furiously wiping her tears with the other, she screamed out, "NATSU! CALL AN AMBULANCE!"

The pink haired boy came rushing up to the entrance of the hallway, taking one glance at Gray before pulling out his cell.

He dialled the number hurriedly and tapped his foot impatiently as it began to ring, "C'mon..." He waited a few seconds before someone actually picked up.

"Hello, Emergency services here, are you after the police, ambulance or fire fighting services?" A monotone female voice asked, uninterested.

"Ambulance." Natsu replied simply.

"Hold for a sec..."

Quiet music could be heard in the background as he was directed to another line.

"Hello, Ambulance services. What's your emergency?" A bright female voice answered the phone.

"My friends cut himself too deep, he needs help now or he's going to die!" he shouted into the phone.

The woman on the other end of the phone paused for a long time. Natsu was about to ask if she was still there when she suddenly spoke up again, "Natsu...?"

"Mira?!" Natsu was shocked to find his childhood friend on the other end of the line, "Listen Mira, you have to spend an ambulance here quickly or Gray's going to die!"

"Gray?" Mira muttered under her breath before speaking up again, "Ok, I know your address so I'll give it to them and they should be over there soon."

"Kay, thanks Mira..."

Mira-Jane hung up without a word.

Natsu's POV

It seemed to take forever for the ambulance to get there and Gray was slowly fading in and out of consciousness.

When they finally arrived it took all of Natsu's strength not to have a go at the ambulance officers for being so slow.

They carted Gray away in silence, nobody saying a word.

Erza held tight to Natsu, grabbed fistfuls of his shirt and crying into his chest. He placed a hand on her head and began to stroke her hair gently, trying to sooth and comfort the crying girl.

She didn't usually show this much emotion, but I guess when your friend is on the verge of death, you just can't help it.

The pair stayed this way for a long time before Natsu slowly pried the still crying Erza from his clothes.

"C'mon," he whispered, "We should go to the hospital now and see how Gray's doing."

"Mhm." Erza nodded.

As the two of them drove down to the hospital, Natsu couldn't help but wonder if his lifelong rival would actually be around to see another tomorrow.

Lucy's POV

Her patient had his eyes closed. He was stable but had needed multiple stitches all up his arm, which was now covered in plain white bandages.

His hair was dark and falling into his face and from the angle Lucy was at, it seemed as though his eyes had been almost consumed by his hair.

She was nervous; it was her first proper patient. She was actually going to look after this man during his stay in hospital. She could barely believe that her first job as a nurse had come so soon.

She glanced down at him once again, taking in the pale skin that was almost as white as the sheets that covered him. He looked weak and defenceless as most of the in-patients did when they were in a condition such as he's.

He was quite handsome really. She didn't understand why his arm was covered in cuts and scars. He looked like such a nice person, someone who didn't deserve to be suffering the way he was.

Lucy let her mind wonder, trying to come up with an answer as to why this guy would possibly self harm in the first place.

Since she couldn't come up with an answer she decided that she would find one. She'd help her patient through this time, no matter how hard it was. Because as a nurse, Lucy considered helping her patients as her top priority. She didn't care about what lengths she'd have to go to help him. It was her job after all!

Lucy had just made up her mind when her patients eyes slowly drifted open.

"Lucy..." he whispered, sending beautiful shivers down her spine.

xxxx

**Well there we go! That's the first chapter over and done with. Hope you liked it and didn't think it was too boring.  
Also, I do not promote self harm or any of the mental disorders that may appear in this story. It's not a good thing and should be treated professionally!  
Thanks.**

**- LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay! Chapter 2! Woo! Don't know why I'm so excited, I guess I'm just a little proud because I've managed to update all my fics today! I just hope they were of a reasonable quality.  
Anyways, please remember to read and review as it really inspires me and it makes me so happy.  
Thanks!**

xxxx

Chapter 2: Forgotten

Gray's POV

"Lucy..." The familiar form of his old friend was standing at his bed side.

She was dressed in a pale pink nurse's dress that was just short enough to get a good view of her lovely long legs. The uniform was also a little on the small side, so it accented her curves perfectly.

Her big brown eyes were a little hesitant at first but then she just smiled warmly at him in the same way she had done all those years ago as she waved goodbye.

It had been so long since he'd seen her; he hadn't spoken to or seen her in 5 whole years. Yet here she was, at his side, in the hospital.

Ugh. The hospital.

As he remembered why he was here he gave a little groan and shifted his arm over his eyes. This action made him wince in pain.

He looked down at his arm.

It was covered in bandages. No doubt to cover the scars and stiches that lined his arm.

"Sir, are you alright?" Lucy looked at him, concerned.

"Huh? Yeah...I'm fine. But why are you being so formal with me?" Gray was wondering why she was calling him 'Sir' when they'd been friends for so long.

"Oh! I'm sorry. It's just that I don't know your name yet. Um, hang on; I've got my clipboard around here somewhere..." Lucy was dashing around the room a little frantically, trying to find her clipboard with all the patients' information on it.

_I don't know your name yet..._

Those words were echoing around in Gray's head as he stared blankly at the white hospital wall.

_"She doesn't remember me."_ He thought to himself, _"How could she not remember me?"_

It had been 5 years since the two had parted ways. It had been a long time.

Yet Gray wouldn't have thought that the blonde girl could have forgotten about him already.

"Lucy..." He mumbled to himself.

"Yes, my name's Lucy!" She flashed her little white name tag that rested over her right breast. " Sorry I didn't introduce myself. Well, I guess it's a good thing I wear this name tag or nobody would remember who I am. Aha, see I always forget to give people my name. But I'm surprised you could read it from there. You must have really good eye sight. You're lucky. I have a friend who's blind as a bat, can't see a thing...Hey...Sir? Are you ok?" She stopped her rambling and looked at him, cocking her head to the side as if to get a better look at him.

"Huh? Oh yeah...I'm fine." Gray had blanked out for a bit. He could hardly believe that she'd forgotten about him.

"Oh!" Lucy let out a gasp, momentarily distracted from her patient as she had finally managed to find her clipboard.

Gray watched her as she bounced over to a nearby chair, picking up her bright green clipboard.

"So..." she flipped through a couple pages, "Your name's Gray Fullbuster, correct?"

"Yup, that's me." Gray mumbled, avoiding her eyes.  
"And you're here because...Um...You cut yourself too deep...?" She looked uncomfortable. It was a normal reaction. Most people reacted in such a manner when they discovered his secret. Self harm was not a socially accepted thing.

If you were to take a knife to your skin people would consider who as an "Emo" or a "Freak".

But for Gray, it was just his form of coping.

"Yes." He replied, shifting his eyes to look deep into hers.

She moved to take a seat of one of the chairs close to his bedside.

"I-if you don't mind me asking..." She looked down at her hands in her lap, uncomfortable, "Why do you do it? Self harm, I mean."

Gray wasn't sure how to reply. He'd never told anyone why he did it, not even his closest friends.

"You wouldn't understand. No one would." It was his turn to feel uncomfortable as he looked down, avoiding her gaze once again.

Lucy's POV

Lucy was a little hurt.

She didn't know why she was asking the stranger for a reason as to why he cuts himself. She didn't know why she felt so close to him even thought they'd just met. There was just something about this guy that made her feel safe and warm. She felt as if she could trust him.

But the fact that he'd gone and said that she wouldn't understand kind of stung.

She couldn't pinpoint the exact moment, but not long after he'd started talking to her, a switch inside of him seemed to flip.

He had started to become vacant and blank. It was like he couldn't concentrate properly. Something must be on his mind, something big.

She just wasn't sure what it was.

She was about to say that he shouldn't judge on appearances when two people, a girl and a boy, walked into his hospital room.

The girl had long, scarlet coloured hair and dark brown eyes. Her mouth was set in a firm line and she appeared as if she was trying to act serious and tough.

Although the redness of her eyes gave her away. She'd very obviously been crying.

The boy however was smiling weakly, trying to look a little supportive. He had pink hair and greenish-brown eyes. His fists were clenched by his sides and he was clearly very uncomfortable.

The two had obviously never encountered a situation such as this.

Lucy felt sorry for them; it must be hard to see their friend in this state.

The boy had lost a lot of blood and almost died, those two were probably the ones who found him and called the ambulance.

"Gray! How are ya buddy?" The pink haired boy bounded over to him, trying to act as happy as humanly possible.

"Fine." Was all he said in reply.

"Gray...You had us all worried!" The red head scolded.

"Mmm." Lucy had begun to realise that he didn't say much.

The boy turned around suddenly, as if sensing Lucy's presence for the first time.

He bounced over to her, "Hello there! We've never met, I'm Natsu Dragneel!" He seemed over enthusiastic and was trying way too hard to act normal around his hospitalised friend.

"Aha," Lucy laughed a little, "I'm Lucy Heartfillia. I'm Gray's nurse. So as of today I will be taking care of him until he is released from hospital."

"Nice to meet you, Miss Heartfillia." The girl turned her head towards her, "I am Erza Scarlet. The two of us are his flat-mates."

"Oh I see," Lucy nodded, "Well, I'll leave you guys to it. But I'll be back in about half an hour, ok?"

Erza and Natsu nodded whilst Gray stared out the window.

Lucy left without another sound.

She felt strange. Something she'd never felt before. But she just could understand what it was.

Perhaps she was just curious about Gray Fullbuster's condition, after all, she'd never come across a case quiet like his.

Although he was her first patient, she had accompanied many other nurses' during her training and had never actually seen a patient like him before.

He intrigued her.

His silky black hair that seemed slightly unkempt and those dark, sorrowful eyes that stared in her soul.

His soft-looking pale skin and well sculpted muscles.

Those perfect, luscious lips. They looked so lovely and kissable.

Wait, what?

_"Slow down Lucy! Just where the hell is your mind wandering off to? You just met the guy. Seriously, you don't even know anything about him!"_ She scolded herself internally.

Why all of a sudden was she thinking about how kissable his lips were when she'd only just learned his name around five minutes ago?!

She mentally slapped herself for getting way too far ahead of herself.

_"Geez. It's been way to long since I had a boyfriend..."_

As Lucy lay awake in bed that night, her mind couldn't help but turn to the mysterious Gray Fullbuster.

What exactly was it about him that intrigued her so much?

She was curious about him. She wanted to know more. Not just about his condition but about the real Gray. She wanted to know what he was feeling and how to help him. Yes, she wanted to help him. To heal both his mind and body.

Or maybe she just wanted all of him.

All to herself.

xxxx

**End of Chapter 2! I can't help but feel that this chapter is a complete failure. *Sigh* :P  
I feel bad that I've put Gray and Lucy in such a terrible position but I was in a depressed mood and wanted to write something sad and a little relatable. But I think I failed miserably. Oh well!  
Don't forget to ****read and review****! It means so much, really.  
Thanks!**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Woo! Chapter 3! To be honest, I was actually thinking about deleting this fic...But then received some lovely reviews from some lovely people. Thank you so much guys, you really inspired me to keep writing.  
See, here is why I tell people to read and review. It honestly does inspire me to write more :)  
Arigatou!**

Chapter 3: Scarlet

Gray's POV

It had been two days since Gray had been bought into hospital.

Lucy still didn't remember who he was.

He had tried everything.

He had talked about and old 'friend' of his and shared some of the stories from their childhood.

Although she never seemed to catch on. She still hadn't realised that this childhood friend that he kept talking about was actually her.

He sighed, running a hand through his midnight hair.

_How long until she realises who I am? I can't believe she doesn't remember me. Yeah, I know it's been five years and all but we grew up together as neighbours for 2 years before that! C'mon Lucy, remember!_

His thoughts were interrupted as a scarlet haired girl glided gracefully into the room. Her deep brown eyes were soft for once, yet still serious and watchful.

There was no one in the room except for the two of them.

"Hey there Gray. How are you?" Erza was being strangely nice today.

Gray was a little confused at first and didn't reply. He wasn't sure if it was just a trick of the light or if maybe, just maybe, Erza's cheeks were just a little bit red.

Was she...nervous?

"Gray? Hello? Earth to Gray!" Erza was inches away from his face, peering down at him strangely.

"Huh? Oh, I'm fine thanks. How are you?" he replied finally.

Erza took a seat on the nearby chair to Gray's left, "Um, I'm alright. Although..." Erza's face was now the same shade of red as her hair.

"Although?" Gray repeated, urging her to continue.

"Well you see..." she took a deep breath in, "Jellal is coming to visit you tomorrow and he's bringing his new girlfriend!" Erza blurted out suddenly.

Her bottom lip was quivering and her hands were fighting the urge to shake uncontrollably. Her usually serious expression had been cast away and replaced by one of hurt and pain. Those oh so serious eyes were now filled with sadness and the beginnings of tears.

Gray didn't say anything, he just stood up, making his way over to where the scarlet haired beauty sat on the verge of tears.

He kneeled on the ground before her so they were face to face. He pulled her into a warm, friendly hug.

"What do you need me to do?" He asked quietly as he pulled back to look into her tear-filled eyes.

"I-I don't know...All I know is that I love Jellal so much and for a moment I thought he loved me. But now he has a new girlfriend and I'm going to have to see them together tomorrow. I don't know how I'm going to handle this Gray!" Erza wailed, finally letting her tears overflow.

This reaction was so unlike her. She usually never acted this way. But something had changed.

Ever since Gray had got admitted here to the hospital Erza seemed to find it harder and harder to keep her emotions in check.

It was his fault.

Gray was sure of it.

Why? Why did he always cause other people pain?! First when he went to fight Deliora. He had put both his mother figure, Ur and his brother, Lyon in severe danger.

Then Ur died whilst fighting him and Lyon almost died.

Lyon had blamed his for what happened and still resented him to this day.

Gray honestly couldn't blame him for saying it was his fault that Ur died. Because it was.

Ur died because of him.

He had only ever caused the people around him pain. This is why no one would ever love him. How could they? If all her ever did was destroy the things he touched, how could anyone love him?

He was a monster.

And now Erza was losing it. She was already stressing over him being in hospital after he almost died, and now that Jellal was going out with some new woman, it was only making her more upset.

He sighed heavily, "You didn't answer my question. Tell me Erza, what would you like me to do?"

"Well I-I um...You see...I was thinking..." She stuttered, unsure how to form the words.

Gray raised an eye brow, "You were thinking about...?"

"I thought that maybe you could pretend to be my boyfriend...Just for a little while! It'll only be until Jellal leaves. I promise!" She looked up at him with pleading eyes, "But you don't have to if you don't want to. I know you must think it's such a stupid and crazy idea...But please Gray. You're my best friend and I need your help!"

She was practically begging. Gray couldn't believe that he had done this to her. He'd caused her so much grief that she had reduced herself to this! What the hell was wrong with him?

He sighed inwardly. He wasn't going to like this, but he really did owe her. He'd caused her enough pain already so it was better for him to help her out now than see her suffer later.

"Okay."

"You'll do it?" Erza looked up at him in surprise.

"Yeah, I'll do it." He paused, "But this is a onetime thing ok? It won't ever happen again."

"Okay. I got it!" Erza grinned, "Thank you so much Gray! I'll see you tomorrow! Bye!" she shouted, running out of the room in an excited manner.

It was at this moment that his nurse decided to enter.

"She looked happy. What was that all about?" Lucy stood in the door way, holding a tray of food, "And why are you out of bed?"

Gray, suddenly realising where he was, jumped up suddenly and hoped back into bed.

"Oh...Uh, no reason."

"If you say so..." Lucy pouted, looking at his suspiciously before breaking out into a grin.

She handed him his lunch tray carefully and he instantly began to dig in hungrily.

She smiled sweetly at him.

God she had such a lovely smile. It was adorable. But it reminded him so much of the old days. Back when they lived next door to each other and Lucy had sworn that she'd never forget him.

Lucy's POV

She didn't know why this way happening. Her heart had been pounding in her chest when her fingertips brushed his as she passed him a tray of food.

How is this possible...to suddenly gain feelings for someone you've only just met?

It was driving her crazy.

She was so happy to just be near him, to talk to him. Oh how she loved to talk to him. It was as if they had been friends for a very long time.

Those deep blue eyes would stare into hers in such a familiar way. It was so strange and yet so lovely.

But at the same time...She couldn't help but notice the bandages that ran up and down his arm.

Whenever she had to change them she would have to look at the terribly deep cuts and scars.

Those scars would not fade. They'd be there for life.

And it pained her to see them.

She didn't know why he was feeling so horrible that he had to hurt himself.

What would make him do something like that? What pain has he endured? What has made him this way?

Lucy had so many questions she wanted to ask him but after her first attempt she wasn't exactly keen on trying again.

He didn't seem to like people knowing about it or faking a fuss over it.

But still...she desperately wanted to help him. As a nurse and possibly as a friend.

Although she wasn't sure if he considered her a friend yet. Or if her ever would.

There was something about him that she couldn't quite put her finger on. She wasn't sure what it was yet.

But she knew that she had to find out.

Gray's POV

It was around one in the morning when Gray finally had the courage to move.

He was grateful that Natsu had delivered some of his stuff yesterday.

A few changes of clothes, my iPod and my phone.

That's all I'd asked for. I didn't really want anything else since everything I owned seemed to have some form of a harsh memory attached to it.

His phone was particularly important.

He smiled to himself, sliding the back of his phone away to reveal a careful concealed razor blade.

These blades were so hard to obtain. You had to go through so much trouble of trying to separate the blade from the actual razor without doing any damage to the blade in the process.

But over the years Gray had accumulated many of these blades and had become some sort of an expert at removing them.

He had them hidden all over his house. The back of the phone was just one of the many hidding places he had for his blades.

He looked to his right, making sure that the box of tissues was still where he left it.

Good. It was still there.

He held the shiny piece of metal in one hand as he moved his phone over next to the box of tissues on the dresser.

Finally, he could relieve the mental pain that had been building up for 2 days with the physical pain of the blade biting into his skin.

He slid the sharp metal across his wrist once.

_Useless idiot, all you ever do is cause pain for the one's you love_.

Twice.

_You fuck head! Can't you do anything right?_

Three times.

_Look what you did to Erza; she's so stressed because of you!_

Every time he cut, a treacherous thought would make its way through his mind.

20 bloody slices later and Gray was done, holding a thick lot of tissues against his wrist.

He had been careful this time so he didn't cut too deep.

God knows what would happen to him if they fought him like this.

He already had a meeting with some psychiatrist tomorrow and he wasn't looking forward to it.

Suddenly the doors burst open and a blonde nurse with big brown eyes walked in, charging right at him.

"Lucy!" Gray almost shouted, unable to move in her presence.

She looked down at his bloody wrist and frowned.

Lucy looked up into his eyes, her deep brown orbs filled with sadness.

She touched his cheek lightly and mumbled to herself, "Oh Gray..."

xxxx

**There we go! Did you's like it? I hope so. I actually had the motivation to write this chapter, unlike the previous two. To be honest, I don't know why I started this fic in the first place, but I'm glad I did :)  
Don't forget to READ AND REVIEW guys! It's much appreciated.  
Thanks**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys, I'm so sorry it took me this long to update :P  
It's just that with Christmas and all these festive things I haven't had much time to work on my fics.  
Well, finally, I've managed to write the next chapter!  
So enjoy!**

Chapter 4: Discoveries

Lucy's POV

She could feel tears welling up in her eyes but she stayed strong, clenching her fists that rested on her chest.

"Lucy!" He had shouted in surprise as she burst through the doors.

She had just come to his room to do his hourly check up and change his bandages since she had forgot to change them earlier...But instead of finding the dark haired boy with a neutral expression just sitting there, on the verge of falling asleep, as she had expected. She had found him with blood dripping from his wounded wrist and a deep, dark sadness in his eyes.

She strode over to the teary eyed Gray, resting a hand on his cheek as a sign of comfort, "Oh Gray..." she whispered, truly saddened by his pain and suffering.

His dark blue orbs stared into her brown ones, both hurt and a little shock.

Tears had begun to stream down Lucy's creamy face, making small wet spots on Gray's shirt.

She clutched his shirt harshly, pulling at the fabric and sobbing into his chest.

"Why? Why do you do this to yourself? I know I have no right to ask you such as question since you barely even know me, but please, just tell me! I want to help you get better. It's my duty as a nurse!"

Gray's face darkened as he pulled more tissues from the box to place over his bleeding arm, "Well that's where you're wrong, Lucy. Because you do know me, or at least you used to. You knew me so well. So in actual fact, you do have a right to ask, because before I moved away, the two of us were best friends. But you forgot about me."

_Knew me so well...  
_

_Best friends...  
_

_You forgot about me..._

Lucy was having a hard time taking this in.

Sure the dark haired boy seemed familiar in some respect, but still...She didn't know him.

She had only just met him the other day.

"Look, I'm pretty sure that you're confusing me with someone else..." Lucy mumbled, unsure exactly of how to go about this unusual situation.

"No. I'm sure it's you. I even have photo's at home to prove it. You're Lucy Heartfillia, daughter of Jude and Layla Heartfillia. You and I grew up next door to each other for 2 years until your mum died and you moved away. The two of us were best friends during in that time and you don't even remember me. It hurts Lucy. It makes me feel so worthless knowing that my best friend from 5 years ago could just forget about me in an instant. You wanted to know why I do this to myself," He held up his bloody arm, pointing to it as he spoke, "Because I'm worth nothing. I shouldn't exist. All I do is cause people pain and suffering just be being near them. No one wants to know me, not even you. And I don't blame them. If I were them, I wouldn't want to know me either."

His eyes were stone cold and deadly serious. They bore into her chocolate brown orbs, full to the brim with self loathing.

"G-Gray...I don't remember..." She stuttered out, feeling completely awful about herself.

Had it been her fault that he cut himself tonight? Because she had caused him pain by not remembering him?

She was trying so hard to remember. Deep down she knew that Gray wouldn't lie to her. Perhaps this was because of the trust the two had built up back before she forgot who he was?

Maybe that was why he felt so familiar and warm and trustworthy?

But still, no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't remember.

He had said that 5 years ago she had moved away because of her mother's death.

That was true. Everything he had listed about her was true.

So why couldn't she remember?

There was a massive gap in her memories.

She could remember moving to a new neighbourhood and being extremely excited. Then there was just nothing until she remembered the terrible sadness after she had moved away.

A whole 2 years seemed to be missing from her memory.

"Lucy..." Gray whispered, pulling her into a hug.

She gasped a little.

His arms were strong and held a firm grip around her body. The warmth emanating from him was enough to make her cheeks flush red.

She was still finding the time to be embarrassed, even in the mist of all this chaos.

"Gray, I don't remember anything from those two years. I can remember moving there, and how excited I was. But then I can remember moving away and being tremendously sad. Everything in between is blank."

Gray sighed, leaning back a little and pulling Lucy up onto the bed with him.

He touched her cheek gently before tucking a strand of soft blonde hair behind her ear, "Don't worry Lucy," he whispered into her ear, painting her cheeks a new shade of red, "I'll find a way to make you remember. No matter what, I'll find a way."

Lucy smiled into his chest as the pair laid there silently for a while, unmoving, just savouring this little moment of peace.

Gray's POV

Eventually Lucy had gotten up and fixed up his arm. She replaced his old and bloody bandages with new ones, gently wrapping his arm in the white cloth until his fresh cuts had been completely covered up.

She had also informed him that she would have to report this incident to one of the doctors here at the hospital.

Gray wasn't very happy about this but it was understandable to some extent.

After she'd finished up all her nurse stuff, the dark haired boy had expected her to go straight away to report his little 'incident'.

But instead, she surprised him by asking him if he could just stay by his side for a while.

This had shocked him a little but he quickly covered it up with a warm smile before patting the side of his bed for her to sit.

She complied easily as she down softly.

And then he surprised her by pulling her down to lay against his chest. This had made her gasp and even taint her cheeks the slightest shade of red.

But she soon relaxed as she lay on her side, curling up against his side and resting her head on his chest whilst Gray wrapped one arm around her shoulders and placed the other under his head for support.

It reminded him of a particular time 6 years ago, back when they were best friends, lived next door to each other and Lucy had been over at Gray's house.

Lucy had been 12 and Gray had been 13 years old.

The two of them had been watching some scary show on TV and Lucy had been terrified...

_Gray was lying on one end of the couch and Lucy had been sitting beneath him on the floor.  
_

_Suddenly, a vicious murder had taken over the screen, blood dripping from his sickly smiling mouth.  
_

_Lucy had jumped and spun around, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck.  
_

_Gray smirked, stifling his giggles as a terrified Lucy clung to him in fear, "You're not scared are you Luce?" he asked in a mocking tone.  
_

_"N-No..." she stuttered, biting her lip as she tried to stay strong.  
_

_Suddenly the TV began to scream at them as a young girl ran desperately across the TV screen in pure fear.  
_

_Lucy jumped, screaming as the murderer carved a deep cut into her arm._

_"Ahh! Gray!" She cried out.  
_

_Gray's eyes softened as he lifted her little body up onto the couch to lie beside him.  
_

_He turned the TV off and laid back with his head propped up by a pillow and a small blonde girl curled up at his side with her head on his chest.  
_

_He placed an arm around her little shoulders lovingly.  
_

_Gray and Lucy had been friends for about a year now and even though the blonde was a bit of a cry-baby, Gray still liked hanging out with her.  
_

_She could be quite fun when she wanted to be.  
_

_"Gray?" Lucy was looking up at him with big brown eyes.  
_

_"Yeah?" Gray asked, tilting his head to look at her properly.  
_

_She was running a hand over the marks on his arm with a troubled expression, "Why did you do this to yourself?"  
_

_That was the first time Lucy had asked him about his cuts.  
_

_Back then there hadn't been any scars and his cuts weren't that deep, but they still bothered Lucy.  
_

_He sighed loudly as he tilted Lucy's face up to look at his own, turning her cheeks a soft shade of pink, "I'm fighting a battle, and some people may not think it's that hard, or that I have no reason to do this to myself...But Lucy...I feel worthless. I cause people pain when I don't even mean to. Everywhere I go I cause trouble. And I hate myself for that. Ur is dead because of me and now Lyon hates me for that. You see Lucy...Everyone hates me or forgets about me. It's always been liked this." _

_Gray didn't think he had given a very reasonable explanation but apparently, for Lucy, it was fine.  
_

_She gripped Gray's hand tightly, staring intensely into his dark blue orbs, "I promise Gray...I'll never hate you or forget about you!" She smiled warmly as she rested her head back down on his chest lightly.  
_

_Gray had been shocked at first but eventually she just smiled and tightened his grip around her shoulders, watching as the young girl fell asleep in his arms.  
_

_As sleep began to overwhelm him, he thought of how lucky he was to have a best friend like Lucy Heartfillia.  
_

_He finally let himself fall asleep alongside her, for once feeling that maybe, just maybe, things would be ok._

Gray woke suddenly.

Lucy was gone and light was shining through the curtains that were closed over the windows.

He must have fallen asleep whilst he was reminiscing about his time with Lucy.

Maybe it was true what they said about dreaming about whatever you fall asleep thinking about.

The dream about Lucy had been more like a memory fragment.

It was the exact scene from 6 years ago, a year after he had first met Lucy. And the first time Lucy had found out about his cuts.

He was surprised that she even knew that he'd done it one purpose.

But then again, Lucy was smart, a lot smarter than she let on.

Yet she had always had struggles with her memory.

Although, this didn't explain why a whole two years was missing from her memory. It was just too strange.

He had to find a way to get Lucy to remember. Maybe he would get Natsu to bring in some pictures? No...Gray didn't trust the pink haired boy with something like this.

"Ugh..." he mumbled, already dreading the events of today.  
He had a psychiatrist's appointment today and then Jellal and his new girlfriend were coming to visit. This meant that he would have to pretend to be all lovely-dovey with Erza.

Oh, and then he would have to see Lucy in the afternoon. This was both good and bad.

Gray just wasn't mentally prepared for this. Not at all.

At least he only had week until he was discharged.

Although this meant that he only had a week to get Lucy to remember him.

If he could get her to remember then maybe things would be a little like what they used to be liked.

But if not then he would probably never see her again.

xxxx

**Well there we go, chapter 4 is now done. Hope you enjoyed it and didn't think it was too horrible.  
Oh, can I just say that Give me Love by Ed Sheeran is the most beautiful, lovely, perfect song ever? It was actually somehow so inspiring for this fic. I don't even know why.  
Well, anyway...  
Don't forget guys, to ****READ AND RERVIEW****!  
Thanks!**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hiya! I'm so sorry I keep taking so long to update. *sad face* But it's getting so hard to focus. I've been having a lot of sleeping problems lately and some of the stuff in this fic relates to my life. See I have problems similar to Gray in this fic. It's all really tough to deal with so please don't hate me for not updating sooner.  
Feel free to point out any mistakes I've made since I don't have a beta. Oh, and if anyone if free to be my beta, could you please P.M me? Arigatou!  
Oh, and thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, it means so much to me! Thank you, thank you, thank you!  
Also, don't forget to ****read and review**** cause I'm really not sure whether to keep this fic anymore :/  
Thanks for reading :3**

Chapter 5: Problems

Gray's POV

Morning seemed to come all too soon.

Gray was dreading the events today had in store for him. He didn't want to get up and see a psychiatrist about his 'problems'. He didn't want to have to pretend that he was going out with Erza just to spite Jellal. He had nothing against the guy, in fact, they got on pretty well. He did not want to deal with the pain in his arm that made him gasp every time he moved.

But most of all, he didn't want to have to see Lucy.

Her deep brown eyes that were overflowing with innocence. She seemed so pure compared to him.

She radiated brighter than the sun and her smile was dazzling. Her kind words like little bursts of happiness. Everything about Lucy was bright and radiant. She shined.

And then there was Gray. He was cold and dark. His eyes were enough to make you want to back away in fright. He did not have an inviting aura like Lucy.

It seemed that she was light and he was darkness.

She would be the one who could brighten up your day just by looking at you. Whereas Gray considered himself to be the person who could ruin your day just by walking past you on the street.

He felt as though he was nothing compared to her.

Yet she took pity on him and even cried over him. Even though she didn't remember him from before, she was making her own memories now.

But why?

Why was she being so incredibly nice to him when she couldn't even remember who he was? Why would she even want to be anywhere near him?

There was nothing special about him, at least in his opinion.

Yet Lucy insisted that she take care of him, saying something about how it was her duty as a nurse.

It confused him as to why she didn't just transfer to a new patient to get away from him.

After what he had said last night she would surely be a little freaked out since she didn't seem to remember anything about the two of them at all.

If Gray was in her position he'd be running away screaming about how insane he was.

So he'd come to the decision that Lucy was in denial and was simply ignoring how crazy he sounded.

Although he wasn't crazy. Lucy just happened to forget about the 2 years they spent together as best friends, which only made him look crazy.

He sighed, rolling over in his bed to look out the window.

He was on the third floor of the hospital in the psychiatric ward. He had a lousy view of the car park and a bunch of big grey buildings that towered over this little hospital.

He could clearly see the small red car that was reversing smoothly into a parking space.

Gray recognised the car as Erza's as it was the same blood red as her hair.

He groaned and palmed his forehead with his hand. Just the thought of acting like Erza's boyfriend made his stomach tighten in displeasure.

Why the hell had he agreed to do this for her again? Oh right...because he was causing her to suffer...

No!

Gray wasn't going back to that place now. Especially when Erza needed him. And his arm was still aching from last night anyway. He couldn't exactly go about cutting his bare arms until he was allowed to wear his own clothes, in his own home.

The bandaged arm had seemed like a good idea at the time as he really didn't think that Lucy would notice if there was a few more bloody marks on his skin.

But there was just no space there anymore and if he got caught cutting himself in his hospital room he'd be under 24 hour surveillance.

In fact he was surprised that he wasn't already.

But Lucy had been nice and sympathetic about the incident and warned him that if he was to be caught doing something like that again she'd be forced to call in some people to watch him at all times.

She's also taken away his blade. And that was the only one that he had on him at the time. The rest of them were all hidden around his house in places you'd never find.

He sighed as he focused on the task at hand.

How was he supposed to act? He really didn't know so he thought he'd just let Erza do most of the work.

Suddenly the door burst open and Erza entered.

Her hair was swept back into a wispy pony-tail and she had coated her lashes in mascara. Her lips were glossed lightly with a faint strawberry colour and a big fake smile was plastered on her face.

She looked as if she was preparing to walk right though hell.

The uneasy look in her eyes was making Gray nervous. It was really out of character for Erza to be acting so shifty and on-edge.

"Gray." Was all she said as she strode over to him, replacing the fear in her eyes with a look of determination.

She sat on the window side of the bed, the side furthest away from the door.

Exhaling heavily, she turned to face him, resting her head on her arms, which were crossed underneath her chin.

"You ready?" I looked down into her chocolate brown eyes with a nervous smile.

"Not in the slightest." Erza shook her head, tossing her scarlet hair around her face in the process, "How am I supposed to react when I see Jellal with his new girlfriend? I wonder who it could possibly be... And how the hell could he move on so easily? I confessed to him and he said he'd think about it. I never got an answer...Only the news that he was going out with some girl. And I had to hear it from Natsu of all people!"

She sighed, holding her head in her hands.

Gray leaned forward to wrap two strong arms around her shoulder in a comforting manner.

"Hush now, everything will be ok Erza. Jellal is just as crazy about you as you are about him. You remember how close the two of us are. Jellal wouldn't go out of his way to tell him a lie now would he?"

Erza was looking up at me with hopeful eyes that were so unlike her usual cold expression, "You really think so?"

"I know so." He replied, letting a small grin spread out over his features.

And it was true.

Jellal was completely in love with Erza. Gray was actually quite close to the blue haired boy, so naturally, girls had come up in their conversations more than once. And the way Jellal talked about her, you'd think she was some kind of goddess. The only problem was that his parents didn't approve. His dad was so strict about who he dated and didn't want him to have a relationship with the re head. They were allowed to be friends and that was it.

Honestly, if it wasn't for that, two of them would have been together since Erza confessed.

It made Gray sad to know that the couple couldn't be together.

But Jellal wasn't one to give up on the things he loved. He would find a way to make Erza his, despite his parents disapproval.

But at the moment he seemed to be lacking the courage to stand up to them.

"Shit!" Erza cursed as she jumped up onto the bed, snuggling into Gray's side awkwardly, "He's here, his car just pulled up! What do we do?"

Gray was panicking internally but kept his external composure, "Ok, well this is a good start..."

The pair began to get into position as Gray wrapped his arm around Erza's shoulder, pulling her close. The red head rested her hand on his chest whilst entangling her legs with his.

They looked like a real couple in this position.

"Ok, I can hear him coming... Erza whispered as she looked up into Gray's dark blue eyes, "So...Kiss me!"

"What?" Gray was confused. They didn't have to go this far did they?"

He didn't have time to react to what happened next.

The door was opening slowly and out of pure impulsiveness, Erza lifted her head up so their lips could touch just as Jellal walked in.

Shock was written all over the bluenette's face after the scene he had just witnessed.

The girl on his arm was blushing at the sight of the couple kissing on the bed.

Gray could feel his cheeks burning red as Erza pulled back gently.

He could see the faint red tinge on her face as she turned towards the stunned Jellal.

He watched as her eyes widened in shock and her lips moved to form a name, "M-Mira...!"

Gray inhaled sharply as he turned towards the couple standing in his door way.

But he wasn't actually looking at them, rather the person who stood behind them.

"Lucy..." Gray whispered his voice low enough that even Erza couldn't hear it.

The blonde nurse stood not far behind the couple with her hand on the door as she was the one who had let the pair inside.

Her cheeks were bright red and she was biting her lip in an unsure manner. She held her hand up to her mouth in an attempt to cover the surprised shape of an 'o' that her lips had formed.

She stepped back a little, "Um...I'll be back later...After your appointment this afternoon. Don't forget that it's at 2:30 P.M!" Lucy shouted as she ran off down the hallways.

"Lucy!" Gray called after her as she ran away.

Jellal and Mira were looking at him with questioning looks but didn't ask anything.  
Erza was doing the same.

Gray shrugged it off, "Hey there Jellal. Hi Mirajane."

Jellal replied with a warm smile, "How are you Gray?" whereas Mira didn't say anything, just stood her quietly with a shy smile playing on her lips.

"Oh I'm alright, thanks. How 'bout you?" Gray smiled politely, getting a little uncomfortable with Erza being this close to him.

The couple in front of him were staring at them. Gray didn't think that they would've expected this when they decided to pay him a visit. But to be honest, neither had he.

"I'm doing great. In fact, I got myself a lovely girlfriend," He gestured to Mira, his cheeks flushing red as he glanced quickly at Erza, "I believe you two already know Mirajane Strauss."

Gray nodded but Erza didn't say anything. She just gripped Gray's shirt firmly with the hand that was resting over his chest.

It was obvious she was uncomfortable.

He tried to give her a reassuring smile as Jellal began to question him about their relationship.

He sighed, trying to come up with some sort of an answer.

This wasn't going to be an easy day.

Lucy's POV

She could barely believe the sight she'd just seen.

It was that scarlet haired girl from the other day. Gray's flatmate.

What was her name? Erza? Yeah, that was it.

So apparently lose two were dating now.

Gray hadn't said anything about it, but then again, why would he?

She didn't know him all that well.

Although, Gray claimed that they had been best friends for two years until they were separated for five whole years.

She sighed as she walked quickly down the hospital corridors.

Of course he would have a girl friend. I mean, he was a really attractive guy, what with that silky black hair and deep blue eyes.

Hell! He was drop dead gorgeous!

But Lucy couldn't help feel a little sad, almost as if she'd lost something.

She might have even started to like him, despite the fact that he claimed she had forgotten about him and he was a self-harmer. She couldn't help but want him.

She had some small feeling that was growing bigger and bigger by the day.

But he was with the red head now so that meant he was off limits.

Lucy sighed again, rolling her neck to try an relieve some of the tension that had been building up.

She finally started to fall for him and it turned out he had a girlfriend.

How disappointing.

_Why the hell does my love life always have to suck?!_

xxxx

**Well there you go. I've finally managed to update this fic. I'm so sorry it took so long :/  
Well I hope you like the story so far. Oh, and I'm sorry again, I think I may have rushed the last part a bit. Sorry!  
And remember to leave a ****review****, ne? It means a lot. Really it does.  
Thanks :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello again!  
Ok, so today I've finally remember something very important. After forgetting time and time again, I've finally remembered to thank my reviewers! I'm so sorry I didn't get round to this sooner *guilty smile* Please don't hate me!**

**Hinagiku Zeelmart: **Well the reason was because of his past. He blames himself for what happened with Ur and the fact the Lyon hates him as well makes him feel completely worthless. Oh, and thank you for your reviews! :)

**KawaiiOdango:** Tee hee! Glad you like it. Oh, and yes, there will indeed be a lemon later on! Although it will take a while for me to get there as I don't think now would be the right time. It'll most likely be towards the end of the fic.

**IdiotMee:** Thank you! Although I'm not sure if you actually liked it because of the question mark...

**Kuro:** I can't quite tell...I kinda feel as if you're making fun of me. But maybe it's all in my head? I dunno. Also, Gray is one of my favourite characters too so I don't know why I decided to write a story like this using his character. But I guess I just felt that he had more of a reason to than anyone else.

**MartiaLae:** I know I thanked you a little before when I reviewed your story but I just wanted to say thank you once again. Your review made me so happy :)

**Silver:** I'm glad you liked it! XD Thanks for the review.

**Guest:** Don't worry! I always update within 5 days of posting a chapter. I like to make my updates quick because I know how frustrating it can be when you're waiting for someone to update.

**Fairytaillover416:** Kyahh~! Thank you, thank you, thank you! This review actually made me cry, I'm so happy you liked it! It makes me smile to know that you think it's unique as I don't like writing generic fics.

**IloveCeslestialIce: **Oh! I'm so sorry I made you cry! I feel really bad now. Although I am glad to know that you still enjoyed the story. Oh, and don't worry, I don't think I'll be deleting it. People like you, who have gone out of their way to tell me not to have changed my mind :D Thanks :3

**Herbert942:** O/O ! Oh wow. After what you just said I realised what a complete idiot I am. I'm so sorry! I didn't even realise at the time...ah! I'm such an idiot. Sorry! But thank you so much for the review, it means a lot :)

**FairyTailLover333:** Hehe, yes they should have! But I think this makes it a bit more interesting, ne? Oh and sorry for the confusion, it's rated M for the chapters still to come. Thanks~!

**IYRGirl:** I know right! Lucy and Gray are just...perfect for each other. But you never know what could happen. This could lead to something good ;D

**FallingStar93:** It seems that way doesn't it? Well bad things can eventually lead to good things, ne? :P

**Aha, sorry I made that part so long. If I hadn't put off replying to my reviewers this wouldn't have used up over 500 words. Sorry about that :P  
Ok, I'll just get on with it now. Here you go guys, the sixth chapter~!**

Chapter 6: Questions

Gray's POV

A nightmare. That was the only way to describe this day. A complete and utter nightmare.

Gray had known that this day was going to be bad but he wasn't expecting it to be _this_ horrible!

He sighed, running a hand through his jet black hair. He'd only just gotten back from his appointment five minutes ago and had already taken up his post as he sat in the hospital bed once again with the covers drawn up to his waist.

He couldn't believe how utterly terrible this day had been. It was just so full of twists and surprises that he'd given up on trying to control the events that had unravelled in the course of today.

Firstly, there had been that awkward scene between him, Erza, Jellal and Mira.  
The fact that Jellal and Mira had walked in on him as Erza kissed him was embarrassing enough. But then Lucy just had to be the one to open up the door for them, which meant that she saw the whole thing as well!

Damn. Why were things always so complicated?

_It's because of you, Gray. You bring about pain and sorrow wherever you go. And it's all just because of your existence..._

A nasty voice was echoing about his mind, causing him to cringe at the sudden truth.

Gray, in his own mind, thought that he was the cause of all his friends' problems.

_Problems_...

Suddenly Gray's mind travelled back in time, taking him to the unfamiliar room that was used by the psychiatrist.

"_Tell me about your problems, Gray." The tall, tawny haired women had insisted.  
_

_That statement alone was ridiculous. She was basically telling him straight out that he was messed up.  
_

_What kind of psychiatrist does that? I mean...aren't they supposed to...well you know...help?  
_

_Gray rolled his eyes, forcing his breath upwards in an attempt to blow his dishevelled hair from his eyes.  
_

_"Look, lady, I don't have any problems. I'm just here because I'm being forced. I mean, it's not like I would choose to come see you. I'd much rather be at home, by myself without any people." Gray had frowned darkly at her ever cheerful face.  
_

_She was starting to get on his nerves. The way she always smiled constantly. He had the feeling that he could scream obsinities at her and she wouldn't even flinch. _

_That stupid smile would always remain plastered on her face.  
_

_"Why wouldn't you want to be around people?" She asked in an attempt to be professional and failing miserably.  
_

_"I dunno." Gray was going to keep his answers short. There was no way he'd let this stranger into his personal life.  
_

_Besides, she was clearly an idiot with no clue of how to do her job.  
_

_Gray had been to see many counsellors and psychiatrists back when he was living with his foster parents. And this was not how a professional did things. She wasn't doing her job very well at all!_

Gray forced his way back to reality with a sigh. That psychiatrist really was an idiot. In the end she had just asked him some questions about how he felt about himself and even did a massive long test. All for the sake of passing time.

Or so he had thought.

As it turned out, that test, from what he could remember, had something to do with mental disorders.

_So they're finally going to find out what the hell is wrong with you..._

The voice in his mind whispered.

It was true. Tomorrow, when he got the results back, he would have some kind of clue as to what was wrong with him.

Although he really didn't want to know.

They'd probably put him on some kind of drug. Anti-depressants or whatever.

And Lucy, being his nurse, would have to make sure he had them every day until he was out of the hospital.

"Hey there...Gray." Lucy greeted quietly.

He jumped. He hadn't even heard the blonde come into the room, she had been so quiet.

"Oh hi Lucy." Gray smiled half-heartedly at the girl who didn't remember him.

He thought back to a few hours ago and remembered that he had told Erza about her after Jellal and Mira left.

There was something that she had said that allowed him to still have hope that, one day, Lucy would remember who he was.

"You know Gray, you never really forget someone. It just takes a while for their memories to return."

Gray had thought about his sentence all day. Was it possible? That maybe, just maybe...her memories could find their way back to her, that they could return?

He hoped so. That's all that he wished for.

That she could remember him. Remember all the fun times they had together. How they'd sat on the swings in Lucy's backyard, eating apple pie like they were in some cliché movie or something.

Gray had so many photos of those two years. Those two forgotten years...

Wait.

Photos?

Yes! Photos! Gray had a whole box of photos with just him and Lucy from when they used to live next door to each other.

He couldn't believe he hadn't thought of this before!

If he could just get Natsu or Erza to go into his room and bring that box to the hospital then he could show her the photos. Maybe then her memories would come back!

Gray smiled to himself as Lucy waved her hands in front of his face.

"Gray? Hello, Gray?! Anyone home?" Lucy tapped his cheek lightly and Gray snapped out of his trance.

"Huh? What?" He looked into the blondes chocolate brown eyes with a confused look in his eyes.

"You just zoned out for a bit. Are you ok?" Lucy asked, concern crossing her features.

"Oh I'm fine, honestly!" Gray flashed her a convincing smile and slowly, Lucy let the corners of her mouth drift upwards to grin warmly back at him.

He'd missed that smile. He had taken it for granted back when they were younger but now he treasured every single one. Every last dazzling smile that lit her face with sunshine.

It was truly a spectacular sight.

"Well then," her face dimmed as she touched his arm gently, "Let's get this over and done with."

Gray grimaced and the lovely moment was lost in a cloud of despair.

"Right..." was all he could manage as she began to unbandage his wounded arm.

She quickly and gently swapped his old bandages for fresh ones, all while trying to avoid actually looking at his arm.

The scars from his previous experiences seemed to be barely visible under all the redness that surrounded the deep, dark cuts.

There were so many slash marks intersecting across his arm that it was hard to tell where one ended and the other began.

Gray forced his eyes away from his marred flesh and cringed, knowing that Lucy found it quite unpleasant to look at.

He hated making her feel so uncomfortable.

He was just so sick of causing other people grief. He hated himself for it.

Ur, Lyon, Erza, Natsu, Mira, Lucy, Jellal, everyone...they all had to feel the after affects of his internal mental pain.

Even if he only meant to hurt himself, he always ended up hurting other along the way.

Ur was dead because of him.

Lyon hated him because of what he did to Ur.

Erza and Natsu were stressed out to their limit with all the worry he was causing them. And he also left a bloody mess in the bathroom for them to clean.

He had heard that poor Mira had passed out from shock after she had received the ambulance call from Natsu the other day.

Lucy now thought he was going out with Erza and she had to deal with his cut up skin every day.

And Jellal...well Jellal probably hated him after what he'd seen this morning. Especially since the blue haired boy had trusted Gray with the fact that he liked Erza.

So it was true.

All he ever did was cause pain for the people around him. There was never any joy or happiness when his friends were around him.

They were all sad and taking pity on him. They all constantly worried about him and whether he was ok. People would drive down from miles away, all just see him.

But Gray didn't want the attention. He didn't want people to feel sorry for him, especially since he didn't deserve their sympathy.

"Hey Gray..." Lucy spoke quietly as she stood beside Gray's bed with her hands behind her back, "I had this dream..."

Gray raised an eyebrow at the blonde, wondering exactly where she was heading with this.

"You see, in my dream...I'm with this boy. He has really dark hair, just like yours and we're always having fun together. We play childish games and run around a backyard together, always holding hands. Do you think...Possibly...?"

She didn't finish her question as Gray's eyes began to widen in bother surprise and happiness.

His head tilted so he could look deeply into her dark eyes, "Are you starting to remember?" He leaned forward, eagerly.

"I'm not sure. It seems familiar even though it could just be a dream. But Gray, I'm starting to think maybe its true...what you said. I'm sorry I thought you were...well...crazy. It's just that it seemed so unbelievable at the time. But now...after that dream, I think maybe I could be remembering those two years I couldn't remember..."

Gray's mood had shifted dramatically. His smile, for once, was completely genuine. It actually reached his eyes, lighting them up with excitement and joy.

Perhaps...Lucy's memories of him were finally coming to surface!

Lucy's POV

What was this? That smile? It was...amazing.

Lucy had never seen Gray smile in such a way. She now realised that up until now, Gray was always giving away fake smiles.

But this was a real smile that actually reached his eyes. One filled with pure happiness.

All because she had just a glimpse into those two forgotten years.

That smile was making her heart flutter nervously as her cheeks tainted the palest shade of red.

She turned her face away from his and sighed.

_He's off limits now Lucy. Remember that. He's with that scarlet haired girl now so don't go falling for him!_

But she couldn't help it.

The way he was smiling so excitedly at her...it made her want to lean forward just a little bit more. Until, just barely, their lips would brush against each other's so gently they could barely feel it.

_No! Stop it Lucy! Don't go there!_

She scolded herself internally as she quickly said her goodbyes and restrained herself from sprinting out of his room.

Just what the hell was she doing falling for a guy with a girlfriend?

xxxx

**Well, well, well! Chapter 6 complete! But I feel terrible.  
Putting these characters into such horrible, painful positions and making them feel lost and alone.  
But bear with me. Everything will work out in the end, ne?  
Anyways, thanks for getting this far into the story and please remember to ****read and review****! Please, please, please! I just want to know if you guys actually like this story or if I should just delete it. I feel hopeless, don't judge me! D:  
Thanks :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hiya. I'm really sorry guys, I know I said that I update within five days of posting but I'm having a serious case of the can't-be-bothered's. Oh and I'm also sorry for blabbering on about whether or not I should delete it or not. I'm going to stop that now. I'll just suck it up and move on! n.n But in return I'll try to make this chapter a bit longer than usual.  
Ok, so in this chapter, we get to have a little sneak peek into Gray and Lucy's past. Aha, you guys excited? :D  
Also, here are my replies to your reviews for the last chapter!**

**FairyTailLover333:** Thank :) I agree completely! Lucy and Gray should definitely be together! Hehe. I'm working on it :) Also Lucy will eventually find out about the plan but it's going to take a while.

**FallingStat93:** Yes, I can tell :D aha, don't worry, I'm going to finish. I've made up my mind! Thanks for the review~!

**IYRGirl:** You think so? Tee hee, glad to hear it! Sorry for taking so long to update but thank you!

**Fairytaillover416:** I know right? Excited? Aha! THANKS FOR THE REVIEW! Hehe, shouting is fun, ne? :D

* * *

Chapter 7: Flashbacks and Dreams

Gray's POV

"_Gray you idiot! Can't you see what you're doing?" The blue haired girl was shouting at him, her deep blue eyes filled with tears and glowing with hurt, "Juvia has tried so hard to gain your affections and yet you just through Juvia's efforts back in her face."  
_

_He was shocked to say the least.  
_

_This girl, who usually referred to him as Gray-sama because of her high level of respect for him, was now screaming at him in pure outrage and angst. Gray never would have imagined that she could have ever bring herself to be mad at him but he had underestimated her.  
_

_Juvia was usually shy and quiet with very few exceptions. The bluenette had only just recently voiced her feelings towards him but he was unsure how to respond since he didn't feel the same way towards her.  
_

_"J-Juvia..." was all he could say.  
_

_"No! Don't even talk. Juvia doesn't want to hear what you have to say. Juvia knows you are already in love with Lucy-san. That is why you never talk to Juvia anymore. Because of her. Can't you see what you're doing to Juvia? It hurts Gray. Juvia is hurting. You spend all your time with that lovely little Lucy-san but Gray never has any time to spare for Juvia. She is tired of it all."  
_

_"Juvia, that's not it. I still talk to you. We still hang out." Gray was trying desperately to defend himself but she simply wouldn't listen.  
_

_The sky had begun to fill with dark storm clouds and within moments rain was falling down heavily from the sky.  
_

_Gray felt the cold water droplets splash down over his figure and flinched. It was getting so cold. He didn't want to stay out here much longer.  
_

_Juvia just stood there. Her usually wavy blue hair was now sticking to her face, neck and shoulders because of the heavy rain.  
_

_He could barely tell the difference between the rain drops and the tears that were streaming down her face.  
_

_He watched as the blue haired girl bit her lip in frustration and tried to brush away her tears. It was a futile effort as they were only replaced with more and more tears.  
_

_She looked so terribly sad yet all Gray could focus on was how none of this made any sense.  
_

_Sure he'd been hanging out with Lucy more in these recent times, but he hadn't completely forgotten about his childhood friend.  
_

_They had still talked over the phone twice a week as per usual. They still hung out at lunch times, even is Lucy and all her new friends were there too.  
_

_Surely Juvia didn't need to spend every lunch time alone with him.  
_

_Besides, he thought it was fun hanging out with everyone.  
_

_Levy, Lucy, Juvia, Gajeel, Lisanna, Lyon, Sherry, Cana, Laxus and Gray...  
_

_They were all really good friends but still Juvia found something wrong with it.  
_

_Lucy.  
_

_What was it about Lucy that she hated so much?  
_

_Could she really love him so much that she was willing to throw away her friendship with Lucy?  
_

_It had seemed like they were good friends. But lately Juvia seemed to be getting more and more frustrated with the blonde girl.  
_

_Was she jealous of how close the two of them were?  
_

_Gray sighed. He would never understand women.  
_

_"Shush!" Juvia shouted and the rain began to pour down ever harder than before. Lightning filled the sky and thunder echoed around the two young people standing at the edge of Juvia's property, completely drenched by the downpour.  
_

_"Juvia doesn't care what you have to say anymore. Gray, Juvia is tired of trying with you. You never put in the effort anymore. All Juvia does is love you and you don't even acknowledge her. Gray has caused Juvia too much pain and suffering. Juvia is sick of you."  
_

_"No, that's not true! Juvia, I don't love you in the way you want but I still love you as friend! You're my precious childhood friend who's always there and I know I take that for granted but you're special to me!" He shouted desperately over the loudness of the thunderstorm.  
_

_"Juvia is done. Whatever Gray has to say...Juvia doesn't care anymore," the bluenette turned her back on him, tears overflowing from her dark blue orbs.  
_

_She looked back at the dark haired boy and in a voice filled with pure pain and sadness she uttered one last thing to the boy she loved, "Juvia hates you. Goodbye Gray. Forever..."  
_

_And then she turned around again and left a sad young boy on his knees, crying like a child in the rain.  
_

_"Juvia..." he whispered, his pained expression boring into the blue haired girls back, "Come back... "_

He sat up quickly, panting and gasping for air.

Gray hadn't had that dream in almost 6 months. Even though it had been 6 years since the incident, the fact that Lucy was now back in his life was bringing back memories he would have rather forgotten.

It was so very long ago. Way back when Lucy had been living next door to him for nearly a year.

He still found himself having that dream ever so often, yet it had been pretty much half a year since the last one.

And now they had returned once again to haunt him.

* * *

Lucy's POV

The sun was shining brightly through Lucy's bedroom window.

Morning had finally come and as the blonde girl stretched her slim arms above her head, she wondered exactly what this day could possibly hold for her.

She had this feeling stirring in her chest. A feeling of excitement and happiness and a sense that something was going to happen.

Hopefully something good.

She smiled to herself as she tossed back her bed covers and swung her feet over the edge of her bed.

There was a cheerful expression lighting up her face as she walked down her hallway and into the kitchen, her steps light, as if she was walking on air.

For some reason, she felt as if today was going to be a good day. This seemed slightly out of place as her past week had been full of what she described as 'doom and gloom'.

It was nice to be back to her old perky self for once.

She made her way over to her pantry were she kept her bread. She took a slice from the packet and went to place it in the toaster.

She hummed quietly to herself as she waited for her toast to finish.

She wasn't quite sure why she was in a good mood today, but ever since she had discovered that tiny memory fragment of Gray in her dreams, she had just felt so warm and happy inside.

But this also frustrated her.

Lucy could tell that her feelings for the dark haired boy were growing, swelling in her chest and making her heart pound a thousand times a second.

But he was with Erza now. She had seen their lips connect and their cheeks flush red in an intense heat.

They were together.

It pained the blonde to know that the guy she was falling for, and just starting to remember, was now in a relationship with someone else.

She wasn't sure how to respond to these feelings.

The only thing she knew was that she couldn't act on them. There was no way that she would stuff up his and Erza's relationship.

"LUUUCCCYYYYY!" A cheerful voice echoed throughout her apartment.

"Yeah?!" She called back.

"Are you going to the hospital today?" A short girl with blue hair skipped into the room with a cute grin on her face.

"Well of course," She replied as the toaster went off, "I have to work the day shift today so I won't be back until around 6 P.M... so you'll have to make tonight, ok Levy?"

"Oh don't worry about it, I'll probably just order us some take away or something anyway. But I wanted to ask if Gajeel and I could come with you today to the hospital. We wanted to see how Gray's going."

"Oh, that's right. You were friends with Gray back in middle school weren't you?" Lucy asked, picking her piece of toast up carefully and lowering it down onto a plate.

As she began to spread strawberry jam over the golden toast, Levy's face darkened a little.

Although this went unnoticed by the blonde girl as she continued to cover her toast in sweetness.

"Yeah that's right." Levy chirped, "So I was wondering if we could hitch a ride with you on your way. Gajeel and I would like to pay him a little visit just to see how he's doing."

The bluenette was smiling, completely unaware of the tall figure creeping up behind her.

Lucy giggled a little and braced herself for the ear piercing scream.

Levy looked confused, wondering exactly what her best friend was laughing at. She turned to look over her shoulder but by then it was too late.

Large hands crept up to her small hips and muscular arms encircled her tiny waist.

She screamed, an extremely high pitched sound that was harsh on the ears as firm lips trailed over her neck.

He then planted one last kiss on her cheek before the small girl twisted herself round to face her attacker.

"Gajeel!" She shouted, faking annoyance, "You know how much it scares me when you sneak up on me like that!" She yelled playfully, twirling a piece of his long black hair around her finger.

Gajeel simply leaned in and nuzzled her neck, his arms gently hold her against his muscular form, "But I can't help it! You're just too damn cute when you squeal like that." He grinned at her, staring sexily at his lover through half closed eyes.

She giggled and pushed herself closer to him, placing her arms on either of his shoulders before linking her hands behind his neck.

Pulling his head closer to hers, the two were lost in a passionate kiss, hidden behind a mix of jet black and ocean blue.

"Oi, you two!" Lucy scolded and the pair sprung apart, "This is my apartment too you know. And I'd just like to tell you that falling asleep to the sounds of you guys' going at it is something I'd rather not experience again, ok?"

The blonde shuddered from the memory. It wasn't a very pleasant experience, and although Levy was her best friend, she still wasn't quite willing to put up with something like..._ that_.

Levy blushed a deep shade of red and pushed her two index fingers together, trying to look innocent, whereas Gajeel just stood there with his arms crossed over his chest, looking smug.

Lucy gave a little sigh, "You guys still want to come visit Gray?"

They both nodded, choosing wisely to just not say anything that could possibly make the blonde girl any angrier.

"Fine. I'm going to leave in an hour to so be ready to leave soon, ok?" She finished up her toast before sauntering out of the room to grab her uniform and shower.

On her way there, she passed the front door.

Her deep brown orbs caught sight of an envelope lying on the carpet in front of the entrance.

She cocked her head to the side and upon realising that someone must have slipped it through the mail slip on the front door, leaned down to pick it up.

Lucy made her way back to her room before even taking a look at the letter.

On the front side of the envelope there was 'Lucy' written in caps lock in a neat style of writing.

Her mouth formed an 'o'. She never usually got mail this time of the month since most of her bills came towards the end of the month. And it couldn't be a festivity card since it was only September.

With a small pout and a confused expression, she opened the envelope and two pictures and a note fell out.

She read the note first.

_Lucy,  
_

_I realised that I may not be able to make you remember just by being there, so I got Natsu to send you these pictures. Turns out him and Gajeel have known each other for a while so don't freak out an think I'm a stalker of anything like that.  
_

_I wanted to show you this in hopes that maybe it might spark an old memory that lies deep in the back of your mind.  
_

_I also didn't want to overwhelm you so I only sent two pictures. But I have plenty more if you'd like to see them.  
_

_They're nothing special, just a little hope of mine.  
_

_Please remember...  
_

_Gray._

The note was fairly short and Lucy found herself with tears her chocolate coloured eyes.

She couldn't believe that Gray had gone so far as to send her pictures of the past. He must really care about her to do this.

It made her smile. He was so sweet.

She picked up the first picture and took a sharp intake of breath.

There were two blue haired girls standing next to each other, one considerably shorter than the other.

A boy with long black hair standing next to the shorter bluenette with his arms crossed over his chest.

Next to him was a girl with big blue eyes and short white hair, smiling and holding a little bird.

And after her came a tall, muscular boy with blonde hair and head phones slung over his neck.

And still the line went on pretty girl with long crimson hair stood in between the blonde and a silver haired boy.

Facing away from the silver haired boy, stood a girl with dark brown hair, wearing a bikini top and raising a soda can up into the air.

And at last, there was a shy looking girl with blonde hair, holding the hand of a shirtless boy with deep blue eyes and midnight hair.

She flipped the picture over and it had the names of all the people in the picture on them, in order of their appearance.

Juvia, Levy, Gajeel, Lisanna, Laxus, Sherry, Lyon, Cana, Lucy, Gray.

She recognised most of them. Levy and Gajeel obviously since they were her flat mates.

Lisanna she vaguely remembered as they caught up every now and again, whereas Cana was her cousin. They there was her and Gray, holding hands just like in her dream.

The ones marked as Juvia, Laxus, Sherry and Lyon she couldn't remember.

Before she could get too emotional she put the photograph down, quickly replacing it with the other one.

What she saw made her gasp with shock.

Tears flooded her eyes and she found herself clutching her chest in heart ache.

This picture...

xxxx

* * *

**Oooooh! I wonder...what exactly is that picture of? Can you guess? Tee hee, how exciting!  
Kyaaa~! And I'm the only one who knows what's going to happen next. Bwahaha!  
Remember to ****read and review**** guys! Maybe then I'll update a little quicker :D  
Thanks for reading :3**

**- LW / Wonder-chan :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Oh my! Guess who's decided to finally update? Well that would be me! Yay! Gomen ne! It's taken me so long to write this. I've been really busy with my cousin's visiting, counselling appointments and magical friend stuff.  
Moving on.  
You guys excited? Hehe, I know you're all eager to find out what's in the picture so I'll reply to your reviews and get on with it! Just know that secrets are being revealed and happiness is ensured. Enjoy! :D**

**FallingStar33:** I know. Gomen ne! I'm sorry. But here's a lovely update for you :) Thanks for the review!

**Leoslady4ever:** Thank you so much. Yes, poor Gray. I feel quite bad for putting him in this situation. But we all know he'll be ok, ne? Oh, and isn't the song just perfect. Oh, Ed Sheeran...His songs are just perfection. Hehe, your wish may just come true. Secrets are being revealed! :D

**IYRGirl:** Hehe, it's ok, I've updated! Be happy :). And I know right? Gajeel and Levy are just adorable. I've always loved them as a couple. Thanks so much for this lovely review. n.n

**FairyTailLover333:** Yup, it's a cliff hanger! Ahaha, thanks for the review :3

**Fairytaillover416:** Thank you so much for your kind review and I know it's a cliff hanger but here we go, update time! Hehe, I know right? GaLe is just the cutest!

**Herbert942:** Tee hee! Lovely cliff-hanger! Ahaha, thanks for the review~!

**Natpereira:** Continuing~!

Chapter 8: Old Friends

Lucy's POV

This picture...

There was a girl wearing a uniform with a label that read 'Fairy Tail Middle School' and a strange symbol underneath it. She had her blonde, glossy hair tied up with a big blue ribbon and the smile on her face was genuine.

Her face radiated happiness and her eyes seemed to sparkle with joy.

There was a faint red tinge to her cheeks. This was probably due to the boy who was standing next to her and holding her hand.

His lips were curved up into a half smile and he seemed quite cool and calm. His black hair was spiky and a little unkempt but his dark blue eyes were shining with excitement and joy. The only give away that he was embarrassed was the blush residing in his cheeks.

"G-Gray..." Lucy whispered, running her thumb over one of his flushed cheeks.

She could barely believe it.

This was her back in middle school, holding hands with a boy who was now lying in a hospital bed back her work place.

It seemed impossible yet at the same time she knew that it had to be the real thing.

There was no mistaking it. That was definitely her in both of these pictures.

Her friends from middle school in one and the blonde girl and her best friend in another.

There was only one thing that bothered her about these pictures.

The bluenette girl marked as Juvia.

She couldn't help but think that something bad had happened between them.

Of course Lucy had no idea of what exactly had happened back then but it must have been bad.

She flipped over the picture of her middle school friends and reread the neat writing on the back.

Juvia, Levy, Gajeel, Lisanna, Laxus, Sherry, Lyon, Cana, Lucy, Gray.

She couldn't help but wonder why she couldn't remember all of them. What was wrong with her? What had made her forget?

Exhaling heavily she put the photo down and replaced it with the other once again.

She flipped it over, wondering if Gray made written something on the back like with the middle school picture.

_Erza and I aren't together.  
Hope you remember soon, Lucy.  
xx_

She gasped, clutching her chest and grinning to herself happily.

He and Erza weren't together!

Relief flooded her body and her body was almost glowing with happiness.

Although she had no idea why he would tell her in such a way, especially since he written the little confession on the back of a photograph of the two them. It didn't quite make sense.

But never the less, she was happy.

The fact that Gray was actually single left her feeling ecstatic. She could be open with him now; she wouldn't have to worry about making a move on a guy who was already taken. And she was especially glad she wouldn't have to face the wrath of a scary looking Erza if she tried anything with the dark haired boy.

Placing the two photo's, along with Gray's note down on her bedside table, she collected her uniform from her wardrobe and began to make her way down to the bathroom so she could have her shower.

Her elated mood seemed to be affecting her in more ways than one, hence why she found herself humming as she entered the bathroom.

Smiling to herself, Lucy couldn't help but think that maybe she would actually have a chance with Gray.

* * *

Levy's POV

The bluenette was smiling to herself as she sat in Lucy's car, holding Gajeel's hand in the back seat on the way to the hospital.

Once her best friend had gotten out of the shower she had sat beside Levy on the couch whilst they waited for Gajeel to finish getting ready.

Lucy had pulled out two photographs and showed them to her.

At first, Levy could barely believe Gray had actually gone this far to make Lucy remember. But I guess they were all just eager for her to recover quickly.

Almost everyone had known about Lucy's 'condition' for a while now and Levy was glad that she seemed to be recovering, if only a little bit.

The only people who didn't know about it were Gray, Lyon and Lisanna.

Everyone else had found out eventually.

But this was her reason for visiting Gray. She needed to explain Lucy's condition to him, and maybe he could tell Lyon since they were brothers.

Don't get me wrong, the bluenette was most definitely worried about his current state and mental stability, but she knew that with Lucy not remembering who he was, Gray was sure to be in pretty bad shape emotionally.

Still Levy could barely believe that out of all the patients in that hospital, Lucy had been assigned to Gray Fullbuster, their childhood friend.

It seemed almost impossible yet somehow the two of them had been reunited.

"What should I do Levy? You're one of my closest friends, please, tell me. How am I supposed to about him? I don't completely remember him but I remember him enough to know that we were really close..."

Levy was staring at her best friend with concern in her eyes.

She wasn't sure how to help Lucy at all.

"Well Gray remembers everything about you from the past..." She started off unsurely, "So I think that since you two were best friends in the past he'd be willing to wait for your memories to come back."

"You really think so?" Lucy asked, tilting her head to the side, her whole face looked hopeful and even a little child like.

"Lucy, trust me. Gray and I have known each other for ages. I know how he thinks, how much of a kind and caring person he is. In fact, I bet he feels guilty, as if it's his fault that you've forgotten about him."

The blonde's face suddenly contorted into a look of pain and sorrow, "He would really blame himself for me not remembering him? He's done nothing...It's not his fault there's something wrong with me!" Levy watched as her best friend bit her lip and tears threatened to spill from her chocolate coloured orbs.

It was at this moment that Gajeel decided to emerge from the bathroom.

"Oi, what're you guys talking about?" He asked as he sat down on the couch, wrapping his arms around the bluenette.

"Oh, it's nothing babe." Levy smiled up at him, placing a light kiss on his cheek, "We were just talking about Gray."

"Well ok then," He replied, nuzzling Levy's neck tenderly, making her giggle, "Should we get going now? You don't want to be late for your shift, aye blondie?"

Lucy blinked rapidly, clearing the tears from her eyes, "Yeah, ok. I suppose we should leave now. I can't afford to be late." She stood up and made her way to the front door, Levy and Gajeel not too far behind her, holding hands and smiling at each other.

Levy was so glad to have such a lovely best friend and boyfriend. She couldn't be more grateful to be this happy with her life.

But still... She was concerned about Gray and Lucy. These two weren't so lucky when it comes to life in general.

The whole time Levy had been friends with Gray, she'd never once noticed how bad his emotions were.

* * *

When they arrived at the hospital, Lucy was whisked away by a doctor to fill out some forms for Gray's release.

Levy could hardly believe he was being released from the hospital in less than 2 days yet this was the first time she had come to visit him.

"Gray!" the tiny bluenette shouted happily, running towards him and wrapping her arms around his neck, "Are you ok? I'm sorry we only just got here. Gajeel and I have been sooooo busy lately, it's not even funny!" She grinned excitedly up at her childhood friend as she released him and stepped back to be by her boyfriend's side.

The dark haired boy chuckled and smirked at the couple, "Oh, I'm sure you two have been _real_ busy."

This comment caused Levy to blush heavily as Gajeel locked eyes with Gray, the pair of them grinning smugly at each other.

"You boys are so mean!" the bluenette turned to her boyfriend and punched him weakly in the arm.

Smirking, Gajeel's eyes shifted downwards to see her attempting to punch his muscular arm, "Hehe, that the best you got shrimp?"

Levy pouted and looked up at the tall dark haired man before her, "Stupid Gajeel!" she shouted as her cheeks became tainted by a heavy red blush.

Gajeel just grinned and wrapped his arms around her slim waist, pulling her onto his lap as he sat down on one of the chairs beside Gray's bed, "I'll make it up to you later, kay babe?" He whispered into her ear before nibbling her earlobe, making her blush even more furiously than before.

But still, the bluenette didn't protest as she whispered back, "Okay..."

"Oh, come on guys! For real? This is what I get when you guys decide to pay me a visit? Slush-ayyy!" Gray pouted, faking annoyance at the couple's very public display of affection.

He was smiling but Levy could tell something was wrong.

She had known Gray since Kindergarten and she could read him like a book.

The bluenette knew that he was slightly jealous of their relationship. Gray was a hopeless romantic after all.

Levy couldn't help but wonder why the hell he hadn't made a move on Lucy yet.

It was obvious that Lucy had a thing for Gray, and honestly, that boy would crazy to let a girl like Lucy slip away.

Was it because of her lost memories? Probably.

Oh Lucy...Please remember soon...

* * *

Lyon's POV

"Dude, seriously, he's your little brother. You can't just sit there on the couch knowing that he's in hospital. He almost died. Don't you feel any sympathy towards him at all?"

A large, muscular man with blonde hair and headphones resting on his neck and a lighting bolt shaped scar over his right eye was standing over the silver haired man in front of him.

The blonde had been scolding him for almost 15 minutes yet he hadn't even flinched.

"Lyon! Get a grip!" he shouted, his patience wearing thin, "Gray is your younger brother and he almost died. You should at least pay him a visit!"

Even though he'd raised his voice, Lyon refused to react.

Sighing, the muscular man ran a large hand through his spiky golden hair, "Look, I know a lot has happened between you two in the past but I really think you need to just get over yourself and go see him. Do you know how he ended up in hospital, Lyon? He cut himself. He slashed up his arms so deep that he passed out from blood loss at one point. If he hadn't called out for help, the red head and the flame brain wouldn't have made it to him in time. Aren't you the slightest bit worried? People don't self harm for no good reason. I think Gray blames himself for Ur, and for the fact that you hate him. You really should go visit him."  
Finally giving up, the blonde left the room, sliding his headphones over his ears in the process.

"Laxus..." Lyon finally went to speak up but the blonde was already gone.

This left one silver haired man alone in the longue room of his apartment.

He felt his dark eyes widen in shock and his hands began to tremble.

Biting his lip nervously, he wondered if what Laxus had said could really be true.

Could Gray have done something like that because he blamed himself?

Granted, Lyon had blamed his younger brother for the death of their mother and hated him for a long time.

But quite a few years had passed since then and the feelings of hatred towards Gray had simmered down to a mere sizzle.

Why did Gray still blame himself?

"Lyon-sama?" A shy voice echoed through the dimly lit lounge room.

Turning towards the doorway which led to the kitchen, the silver haired man caught sight of his flatmate and girlfriend.

Her wavy blue hair hung loose, curling neatly around her shoulders. A pale blue dress clung to her curves before flaring out slightly just below her hips. The fabric was swirling just below her knees as she moved nervously over to her lover.

Her navy coloured eyes locked with him and a frown marred her pretty features.

"Don't listen to Laxus. He doesn't know what he'd on about. Juvia knows that your brother is nasty and oblivious to other people's feelings. Lyon and Juvia have experienced this first hand and that was how they met each other. How they fell in love." Juvia seated herself on the couch, wrapping her slender arms around the silver haired man's neck and leaning in close to his face.

She had pulled her knees up onto the couch so they could rest gently on his thighs. Juvia had always been one to pursue affection and warmth. She wanted to be as close to her boyfriend as possible so they were often in positions such as this.

She nuzzled his neck with her nose, and Lyon could feel her warm breath against his bare skin.

"J-Juvia..." he whispered, trying to ignore her seductive touches, "But what if... Laxus was right? What if it's all my fault?"

The bluenette kissed his neck gently before answering, "Lyon-sama is not to blame. Gray is a selfish person who craves attention. The only reason he harms himself is because he seeks sympathy from others."

"But Juvia..." Lyon protested, but was quickly cut off as Juvia's slender finger press against his lips.

"Hush. Juvia will take care of Lyon-sama. She will take away all of his fears and doubts and make him forget. Juvia is Lyon-sama's girlfriend and she wants him to be happy." She smiled seductively as she pressed her soft lips against his.

All thoughts of Gray and his condition were cast away and his mind was consumed by the longing he felt towards the bluenette in his arms.

"Juvia..." he whispered, groaning as she slid her small, delicate hands over his chest until she reached the hem of his shirt.

Lifting the fabric up and over his head, she began to kiss his toned chest and abs, leaving love bits everywhere.

Not long after, she pulled back and let the straps of her dress fall off her smooth shoulders as Lyon began to unzip the zipper that ran along her spine.

The blue haired girl was left naked from the waist up, her pale skin exposed.

As she bent down to brush her lips against his, she whispered, "Don't worry Lyon-sama, Juvia will take care of you..."

* * *

**Finally! I finally fished this chapter! It's taken so very long but it's finally done.  
Don't know why I put that little Lyon x Juvia part in there. It was meant to just be Laxus scolding Lyon then Juvia comforting him...But I guess this is her way of comforting him? No clue.  
Sorry guys!  
Don't forget to ****read and review****, kay?!  
Thanks for reading :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Well, you've all cast your votes and the two that were selected were: Pain Can Lead to Love and Two Brothers, One Love. Congrats to those who voted for these two! And since this particular fic got the most amount of votes (YAY!) I'm updating this one first :D  
In reply to your reviews:**

**Leoslady4ever:** Lyon is being stubborn; he won't go and see Gray. Wahhh! :( Hehe, it's time for some answers, with of course, a side of GraLu!

**FairyTailLover333:** Why thank you :) Really appreciate the review, oh and the vote as well!

**Fairytaillover416:** Same, Juvia should just let it all go, but no, I'm stupid and I make all the characters crazy :P Aha, yup! Gajeel and Levy are just so adorable; I couldn't help but put a little GaLe in there. Seriously love that pairing. Also, I decided that I would make Juvia, Lyon, Laxus and Cana live together. Although we didn't see Cana in that chapter, she'll be making her debut any time now. Oh and Natsu... Well we'll find out in this chapter! :D

**Psyka:** Oh wouldn't we all like to know what's wrong with Lucy. Answers are coming soon! Hehe, thank you very much for the review!

**Thank you every one who reviewed and a massive thank you to leoslady4ever, FairyTailLover333, calla-lillies, IYRGirl, noodles swag 101 (that is an awesome name!) and FallingStar93. I was so happy to receive your votes :)  
Just note that I'm changing the view point from third person to first person. It's just more convenient. Thanks! Oh and don't forget to READ AND REVIEW my lovelies. I appreciate every single one :3  
Well then, here's the next chapter!**

* * *

Chapter 9: Hurry up and go already!

Natsu's POV

It had been just over a week since I gone to visit Gray.

And I was hating myself so much because it. The last time I'd gone to see him was the second day of his admission.

I felt terrible but I just didn't have the courage or the energy to leave the house.

There was something holding me back. I have no idea what it is but it's holding onto me tightly and just won't let go. Something strange is stirring in my chest, a feeling so overwhelming and exhausting that I don't even know how to cope with it.

Gray, Erza and I have known each other since the last year of middle school, the year after Gray's now memory challenged best friend, Lucy Heartfillia, moved away.

According to what Gray told me last week before I stopped visiting, the two of them were really close. In fact he was closer to Lucy and than he is with Erza and I now.

I feel terrible for him, knowing that he's suffering with not only his condition but with Lucy forgetting about him after she moved away.

Yet I just can't seem to make myself leave the apartment to go see him.

What kind of a friend was he if he couldn't even force himself to tag along with Erza every morning when she went to visit him in the hospital?

My close friend was going through such a rough time and I'm not even doing anything about it. I felt useless. Utterly, completely, useless.

_Tap, tap, tap..._  
The sound of a fist tapping gently against the wooden door echoes softly around the apartment.

I force myself out of bed, untangling my limbs from the covers and eventually I drag my heavy-feeling body down the hall, and over to the front door.

When I open it I'm greeted by a large pair of breast hitting me in the face as arms wrap around my neck and I fall to the floor with a light weight figure on top of me.

"What the fuck?!" I shout out in surprise as I rub the back of my head lightly. I can already feel the bump forming on the back of my head where it came into contact with the ground.

I grimace as I sit up, a sharp pain shooting through my side before slowly fading to a dull throb. I look up to see the girl who had basically tackled me to the ground.

"Gomen Natsu..." She blushes, embarrassed, as she backs away from me, slightly, though still kneeling on the ground in front of me, "I guess I just got a little over excited since I haven't seen you in a while."

A pair of big blue eyes looked up at me innocently, knowing that I had a soft spot for her, particularly when she looked at me in such a cute manner.

She tucked a strand of her short white hair behind her ear and batted her eye lashes, only adding more appeal to her already adorable face, which was tainted by a soft red blush.

"Lisanna! What are you doing here?!" I pulled her up so we were standing before pulling her into a bear hug, to which she tentatively returned by wrapping her delicate arms around his waist and pulling me closer, pressing herself against my muscled physique.

Her smiled quickly turned into a sad frown as they both let go of each other, "Well after I heard about what had happened with Gray I wanted to come check up on him, as well as you and Erza since you both live with him. I've also heard about Lucy and how apparently she's lost her memories? Gray told me over the phone that she's basically lost those two years of middle school the pair of them spent together. It's really quite sad..." Lisanna sniffled a little before casting her eyes to the ground.

"Hey...Don't get upset. Gray will be fine. He always is." I attempted to comfort her by placing one hand on her cheek and lifting her head slightly so she could see into my dark orbs.

Lisanna gave a small smile and a quick hug. When she drew away her face was serious again, "Natsu..." She started, unsure if she should continue.

"What is it?" I asked curiously.

"Erza told me that you haven't been to see Gray for almost the whole time he's been in hospital. Is that true?" Her big blue eyes were staring directly at mine. There was no way out. I was trapped within the vast blue orbs.

I nodded in reply, turning my head to the side to avoid her gaze. I didn't want to have to see the disappointed look on her face.

"Why don't we go visit him today? I know that he's coming home tomorrow but I still think we should visit, you know? For moral support." The white haired girl had cocked her head to the side, willing Natsu to come with her.

"Nah," I replied with a shrug, "We can just wait until he gets home. I'm sure he'll be fine. Besides, if he wanted to see me he would have called and asked."

But Lisanna just shook her head, looking at him for the first time as though he was stupid, "You don't seem to understand. Self harm is a serious matter. Did you know they ran some tests on Gray the other day? The results aren't something that can be ignored or left till tomorrow."

"Wait...what? He had some tests? What were the results? Lisanna you have to tell me, Gray is a very close friend of mine!" I panicked and placed my hands on either one of her shoulders, my eyes wild with worry.

She shook her head once more, this time with a look of pity in her eyes, "See Natsu, you would have known all this if you had just gone to visit him. Gray has been diagnosed with extremely severe depression as well as moderate anxiety. That's all they've determined so far but there could possibly be more mental illness' that show up in the future. It really isn't looking good Natsu. As his friend you should be there for him, and you know he never would have asked you to visit. Gray doesn't like people going out of their way for him, he feels guilty about it."

"Oh god..." I whispered, dropping to my knees. I was gripping my spiky pink hair and my eyes had gone wide.

"Natsu? Natsu! What's wrong?!" Lisanna rushed to my side as tears spilled from my eyes, flowing rapidly down my cheeks.

"I've been such a terrible friend. For some reason I just haven't been able to leave this apartment all week. I don't know why... I just don't have the energy for it. I know I should be there at Gray's side since he's got it so rough now, but I just continue to be selfish and think about myself. Who am I kidding; I don't even deserve to call myself his friend. I'm nothing to him. Absolutely nothing!"

Lisanna wrapped her slender arms around my now trembling figure, pressing her head to my chest and whispering words of comfort.

"You know it's not too late Natsu. You can still go see him today. In fact, we can go right now if you like. And you can't just give up on your friendship with Gray.

Right now is when he needs you the most and all you can do now is go with me to the hospital and support him. I know for a fact that if you were to abandon your friendship with him now, it would have such a terrible impact on Gray. You don't want that now do you?"

She stroked my hair gently and rocked me back and forth, almost like a mother would to a child.

"N-No... I don't want to hurt Gray anymore." I whispered into her hair.

Raising her head to look me in the eye, Lisanna smiled, "So what are we waiting for? Let's go see Gray!"

The white haired girl stood up and held out her hand.

I found myself smiling softly as I took it and hoisted myself up.

Even when we were both standing and even walking to the door, our hands didn't part. They stayed linked together and that made me happy.

Right before we left the apartment, just as we had reached the door, I stopped her.

"Lisanna..." I stroked her cheek with my free hand and whispered, "Thank you."

And just like that I leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek, which made her blush bright red.

I quickly turned away in embarrassment but didn't let go of her hand.

And that's how we stayed as we walked to her car that was parked out in front of the apartment building. And even once we were in the car, we found ourselves holding hands once more as we speed along the freeway to get to the hospital.

It was nice...

* * *

Cana's POV

"Laxus, we have to do something about Juvia. She resents Gray for what happened 6 years ago. The girl's holding a grudge and holding Lyon back along with it. And right now Gray needs his brother." Tossing silky chocolate waves of hair over my shoulder I focused my gaze on the tall blonde man before me.

"Agreed," Laxus nodded, looking deadly serious despite how relaxed he looked with his hips cocked forward and his thumbs in his pocket, "Natsu and Lyon are our number one problems right now. Since Natsu hasn't left the house in almost a week, I sent Lisanna over to his apartment to convince him to visit Gray at the hospital today. So that should all work itself out. But Juvia is proving to be more difficult. I scolded Lyon last night to try and get him to see his brother but after I left Juvia must have interfered 'cause when I got back, the two of them were going at it on the couch instead."

"Eww, Laxus, I didn't need to know that!" I narrowed my purple coloured eyes at him and frowned in disgust, "Look, I'm really not interested in Lyon and Juvia's love life right now. What we need is to help Gray and the only way we can to do that is by having everyone show their support. So we need to do something about Juvia."

"I know, I know! But seriously Cana, I have no idea what we're supposed to do. You know how possessive Juvia gets over the people that she loves. She's convinced herself that by going to see Gray, Lyon will somehow get hurt in the process. So how are we supposed to convince her to let him go see Gray?" The blonde sighed, exhausted.

I could tell that this had been playing on his mind for a while now. His usual smirk had been replaced by a deep frown and black circles were forming under his eyes from fatigue and lack of sleep.

"Honestly? I don't even know anymore. Juvia's a fighter and sometimes that's a bad thing. Especially in this situation. But you and I have always been there for our friends, so I know we'll find a way. We always do. No matter what, our nakama are always going to be special to us so I won't give up. Gray needs help. But not just from us, from everyone. Natsu, Erza, Mira, Jellal, Lisanna, Juvia, Lyon, Sherry, Gajeel, Levy, Lucy, you and me. He needs his friends, all of them." I was staring intently into his eyes, knowing he'd understand.

"But even if we can all be there for Gray, what about Lucy?" His words shattered every plan in my mind that may have worked eventually. How had I forgotten about my cousin?

How could I forget what she went through?

It hadn't been that long after all.

* * *

_We'd been in an accident on the high way. I was driving the car while Lisanna was in the passenger seat. Lucy sat on the left, with Levy in the middle and Gajeel on the right.  
_

_The bluenette was tickling her boyfriend playfully and giggling when he squirmed under her small fingers.  
_

_The music was turned up loud and blasting from the speakers as we sped down the high at 110. Suddenly the song changed and Lucy started squealing in excitement.  
_

_I hadn't heard this song in so long and before I knew it the 5 of us were singing along with the radio.  
_

_"I got this feeling on the summer day when you were gone.  
I crashed my car into the bridge. I watched, I let it burn!  
I threw your shit into a bag and pushed it down the stairs.  
I crashed my car into the bridge!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care!"  
_

_And right then none of us cared as we sped along with the windows down and the wind in our hair. Even Gajeel, who was never out going, was joining in as he wrapped an arm around Levy's small shoulders and nodded his head in time with the rhythm.  
_

_"I got this feeling on the summer day when you were gone.  
I crashed my car into the bridge. I watched, I let it burn!  
I threw your shit into a bag and pushed it down the stairs.  
I crashed my car into the bridge!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care!"_

The song repeated again as we all sang in time with the lyrics.

"You're on a different road; I'm in the Milky Way.  
You want me down on earth, but I am up in space.  
You're so damn hard to please, we gotta kill the switch.  
You're from the 70's but I'm a 90's bitch!  
I love it! I love it!"

Lisanna had her hands above her head in and was attempting to sway her hips in her seat while Levy had gripped Gajeel's cheeks in both hands and pulled him towards her so their lips could crash against each others.

"I got this feeling on the summer day when you were gone.  
I crashed my car into the bridge. I watched, I let it burn!  
I threw your shit into a bag and pushed it down the stairs.  
I crashed my car into the bridge!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care, I love it, I love it!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care!"

Lucy was pumping her fist into the air repeatedly and I found my shoulders shifting back and forth in time to the beat as I tossed my chocolate brown hair over my shoulders. We were all having so much fun!

"You're on a different road; I'm in the Milky Way.  
You want me down on earth, but I am up in space.  
You're so damn hard to please, we gotta kill the switch.  
You're from the 70's but I'm a 90's bitch!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care, I love it, I love it!  
I don't care, I love it!  
I don't care, I love it, I love it!  
I don't care!  
I love it!"

_And right then as the song ended, we really did crash into the bridge_.

* * *

Tears threatened to spill from my eyes at this moment. Because of me, the car crashed. Lucy was sent to hospital and everyone who wasn't in that car was forgotten.

* * *

**Guys, once again, I'm really sorry for disappearing for 2 weeks. I promise I'll return with a whole load of updates for all my fics and maybe even some new one's as well.  
Unfortunately, I only had time to update one fic and you people who read this are lucky because this one got the most votes!  
It's almost 1 in the morning but I'm powering through for you guys, despite the fact that I have to get up before 7 in the morning, which is a big change since I usually get up at mid-day. Hehe, you're so lucky :D  
Sorry for OOC- ness!  
Well, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter and continue to read it in spite of all my mistakes.  
Remember to ****Read and Review**** whilst I'm gone!  
Thank you so much :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	10. Chapter 10

**Ok! This is the first chapter since I've been back from holidays and I'm really excited. Big things are happening and although you may not find answers as to why in this chapter, be assured they are coming soon.  
Ok, review response time!**

**FallingStar93:** Yes indeed! Lucy forgot after the car crash. It's really sad :(  
But thank you for the review!

**Leoslady4ever:** Hehe, here's the next chapter! Sorry it's taken me so long :)

**FairyTailLover333:** Yup. That's what happened. Thanks so much for the review :D

**Fairytaillover416:** Hehe, I know right! GO LISANNA! :D And I agree, Juvia is being such a bitch at the moment. She really just needs to let the whole thing go :/

**ArchAngel20:** Thank you very much lovely! It means a lot :)

**Psyka:** I know right. I feel so bad for Cana. But hopefully things will be sorted out soon, ne? Thank you so much for your continued support :) Next chapter is here! :D

**Well there you go, that's the replies done! Hope you enjoy this chapter and you'll all be excited to know that another chapter is on it's way right now and should be uploaded later tonight :D  
Don't forget to read and review!  
Enjoy~!**

* * *

Chapter 10: Awakening

Gray's POV

"_Miss Ur?"  
_

_"Yes honey?"  
_

_"Can I play with Gray and Lyon now?"  
_

_"Hehe, of course Lucy-chan!"  
_

_Ur was standing in her lingerie out the front of her house collecting her mail. She turned towards the house and caught Gray lurking in the window, staring out at the two of them.  
_

_Lucy giggled as Ur shouted at the shirtless boy peeping through the glass, "Gray! Get Lyon, Lucy's here to play!"  
_

_Moments later he emerged with a silver haired boy hot on his heels.  
_

_"MUM!" He exclaimed, pointing at her, "YOUR CLOTHES!"  
_

_Ur shrieked as she realised she was in nothing more than a bra and panties, but then she noticed her dark haired son, "GRAY!" She pointed back at him, "YOUR CLOTHES!"  
_

_Then is was Gray's turned to shriek as he realised he was only wearing his boxers.  
_

_So he then turned to his silver haired brother and shouted again, "LYON!" He changed the direction his finger was pointing so it was level with his head, "YOUR CLOTHES!"  
_

_Then Lyon shrieked and Lucy found herself giggling hysterically at her next door neighbours.  
_

_Gray smiled at the pretty blonde girl, his cheeks filling with colour at the sight of her laughing face._

* * *

_Everything faded and a new scene unfolded..._

* * *

"_Cana!" Lucy wailed, running up towards the group of middle schoolers with tears in her eyes.  
_

_The brunette's head shaped up to meet the chocolate brown eyes of her cousin.  
_

_"What happened Lucy? Is everything ok?" Cana asked worriedly, wrapping her arms around her cousin.  
_

_Laxus gave her the once over and decided to leave her alone, Sherry, Juvia, Lisanna and Lyon stared with their mouths open and Gajeel and Levy paused their play fighting.  
_

_"I-I-I..." Lucy stuttered before blurting out, "I forgot my lunch!"  
_

_The whole group stared.  
_

_And then burst out laughing at the blonde.  
_

_Cana wiped tears of laughter from her eyes before smiling at her pouting cousin, "Hehe, it's ok Lucy. You can join us, ok?"  
_

_"Really?" Her face brightened considerably.  
_

_"Of course you can blondie!" Laxus chimed in teasingly.  
_

_"Laxus-senpai, you're a big meanie! How can you say that? You're blonde too ya know!" Lucy pouted again at the tall blonde boy.  
_

_"But you know Lucy," Cana smiled sympathetically, "You can't rely on us all the time. Laxus, Lyon-kun and I are graduating at the end of this year."  
_

_"I know, I know." Lucy said sadly.  
_

_"Lucy-chan?" A familiar voice called out, "Where'd you go? I bought you something from the canteen!"  
_

_The blonde girl turned towards the sound of her best friends voice, "Gray-kun!" She called, "I'm over here!"  
_

_Gray caught sight of Lucy and the rest of their friends and rushed forwards, smiling and holding out a paper bag.  
_

_But as he was running, his foot caught a stone and he tripped. The bag went flying, arching up in the air until it landed directly in Lucy's lap.  
_

_Gray lay sprawled out on the ground, confused as to what had just happened. He rubbed his leg gently as he sat up.  
_

_Lucy opened the bag and gasped in delight, "Ooh! Rice balls! Thank you so much Gray-kun!"  
_

_She set the rice balls down on the ground and leaned over and hugged him tightly, to which he responded by wrapping his arms around her small frame.  
_

_He smiled and whispered in her ear, "Anything for you Lucy-chan..."  
_

_They broke away and Sherry giggled girlishly, "Nawh, you guys are the cutest couple!"  
_

_Juvia growled angrily as the pair blushed deeply and Gray shouted at the crimson haired girl to shut up._

* * *

_Once again, everything faded and the happy images were replaced by one's of sadness..._

* * *

_Gray was sitting on his bed room floor with his knees pulled up to his chest.  
_

_All the lights were out and all that could be heard was the hiccupping sound of the dark haired boy's futile attempts not to cry.  
_

_"Gray...?" Lyon opened the door hesitantly and switched on the lights.  
_

_He groaned and placed an arm over his eyes as he leaned his head back on the wall, "Turn them off, get out of here baka-Lyon!" He sniffled and groaned again.  
_

_"Gray you need to get out of the house. Mum has been nice enough to let you have a couple of days off school but you're going to have to go back eventually."  
_

_"No I don't. I'll just stay in my room forever and never come out!" Gray whined childishly.  
_

_"Baka! You'll just waste away. You haven't eaten in 2 days. Ever since Lucy left you've been a total mess." The silver haired boy was running out of patience.  
_

_He winced at the mention of Lucy's name and instead of replying he just shouted, "GET OUT OF MY ROOM LYON!"  
_

_Lyon growled in annoyance, "Listen up Gray. You're my little brother and I'm trying to help you! Layla-san passed away and obviously Jude-san didn't want to be living in a house full of memories of his deceased wife. Lucy's gone. I know she was your best friend but you have to grow up and get over it! You're not the only one who's affected by this you know!" And with that the silver haired brother stalked out of the room, stomping his feet angrily and even kicking over a bedside table on the way out.  
_

_But Gray didn't even react.  
_

_He was in a world of his own.  
_

_He bought that all too familiar silver blade to his arm and slashed. Over and over again till he couldn't even feel the pain anymore.  
_

_The only thing he could focus on was the fact that his Lucy was gone. His best friend, the girl who meant everything to him... The girl he had started to fall in love with.  
_

_She was gone._

* * *

My eyes opened slowly, I was covered in sweat and panting heavily.

"You ok Gray? You looked like you were having a nightmare or something." A sweet female voice asked in a concerned manner.

That voice...

There was no way...

"Sherry?" I looked up to see a now grown up Sherry with her dark pink hair flowing gracefully over her shoulders.

I took a look around the room.

A tall, muscular man with head phones resting on his neck. Laxus...

A woman with chocolate brown hair and purple eyes. Cana...

A red tattoo on the familiar face of my blue haired friend. Jellal...

A short girl with blue hair pushed back by a head band and a tall man with long spiky black hair. Gajeel and Levy...

Two girls with white hair. One with hair barely past her neck whilst the other's was almost at her waist. Mirajane and Lisanna...

A silver haired man with that same lopsided grin I'd grown up with all my life. Lyon...

A black fur trimmed hat resting on top of blue hair that curled oddly at the ends. Juvia...

The familiar faces of my flat mates. Natsu and Erza...

And at last, blonde hair and caring brown eyes. Body clothed in a pale pink nurse's uniform. My nurse and my best friend. Lucy Heartfillia...

Everyone.

Everyone was here.

How this happened, I had no idea. But he did catch a relieved look passing between Laxus and Cana, who were standing unusually close to each other.

I should be relieved.

I should be grateful that my friends have all gathered here today despite some of the stuff that's happened in the past.

So why is it that I want to run?

Why is it that I want to sprint out of the room and over to the balcony where I can jump down into a world without pain?

My friends are here. I'm being released from this god damned hospital today. And the girl I'm in love with is standing no more than a metre away from me.

But she still doesn't remember.

I still don't have answers.

And I'm still left with this sinking feeling in my stomach like I could just commit any time now.

But somehow I choke out a thank you and they all take turns in hugging me.

I give them my best fake smile and hug them back, saying how much I've missed them. Even Juvia, who seems a little uncomfortable and sceptical, but she still hugs me none the less.

Although this feeling still haunts me.

"Ok... Well it's time to go guys. Gray all your paperwork has been taken care of so you're free to leave from this moment on." Lucy smiled at me kindly and everyone cheered.

"Ok guys! Party at my house to celebrate!" Cana shouted punching her fist into the air.

"WOO!" They all shouted happily.

I smiled half heartedly, "Um... Cana?" I asked, gaining everyone's attention.

"Huh? What is it Gray?" She asked slightly concerned.

"Well I'd like to make a request. Can Lucy come along too?"

Lucy gasped a little at my question, turning bright red, "G-Gray..." She stuttered.

"Oh that's fine! C'mon guys! Let's help Gray pack and we'll get on the road!" Cana cheered.

Two minutes later we were all piling into our different cars and heading off to the place that Cana, Laxus, Lyon and Juvia shared.

* * *

Within half an hour they were set up and partying.

Cana provided the alcohol of course whilst Laxus managed everything else.

Music was pumping loud throughout the entire house, no doubt the neighbours would be annoyed by this.

It was around 8 at night when the party had started but time seemed to flash by and before we knew it midnight had come and we were all in a semi drunken state, dancing on the tables and downing shots every few seconds.

Levy and Gajeel were making out on the kitchen bench and muttering obsinities in each other's ear. But their version of whispering was more like shouting to the rest of us.

Natsu and Lisanna were having a failed attempt at a flirtatious conversation on the couch.

"L-Lisssanna..." Natsu's speach had become slurred from his excessive drinking.

"Hmm?" The white haired girl rocked back and forth a little, losing her balance even though she was sitting down.

"You're pretty!" He giggled as she fell into his lap and looked up at him innocently.

Well... We all know where that's going...

Erza and Jellal had sorted things out between them. Mira knew that Jellal was interested in the scarlet haired beauty, and to be honest she was only going out with him to make a certain green haired man jealous. So Erza was now seated on Jellal's lap, arms wrapped around his shoulders and grinning happily to herself.

Mira was obviously not affected by this in the slightest and was now having an excitable drunk conversation with Freed, whom she'd invited not long after the party was under way. She'd also invited her brother Elfman, Evergreen and Bickslow as well.

Sherry was seated on the couch opposite from Lisanna and Natsu, with her legs placed over her fiancée, Ren, who was also invited not long after the party started, and sharing a bottle of vodka with him.

And as for Laxus, Cana, Juvia, Lyon, Lucy and I, we were dancing around the longue room and dining room.

Lucy and I found ourselves grinding against each other on the large table in the centre of the room.

I wasn't going to lie, this was a major turn on.

With her back facing my chest and her ass pressing against my hips, it was pretty hard not to lose it.

I gripped her hips and she tilted her head back.

She swung herself around and pressed her chest against mine whilst her hands gripped my back at first before trailing down to grip my ass through my pants.

I did the same to her and pushed a leg between her thighs.

We were both panting heavily and no longer dancing in time with the music.

Before I had time to react her lips came crashing down on mine.

The kiss was hot, sweet and passionate.

So overwhelming and emotional. Full of lust and built up feelings.

I gripped her ass tighter and her hands made their way back up my back to entangle themselves within my hair.

She bit my bottom lip gently and gave one last sweet kiss before breaking away.

"Damn..." was all I could say as we stood there, in the centre of Cana's dining room table, gasping desperately for air.

* * *

**Well there we have it. This chapter is done! Hope you enjoyed it :)  
Just for anyone who's wondering, this was before the scene where Lucy and Gray were watching the scary movie since Ur is still alive. Just making sure I don't confused the hell out of everyone.  
Oh and a very important question to all my readers. Would you's like a lemon later on in this fic? I'm still not sure if I should do it but some input would be really nice!  
So don't forget to review! I'd really like to know what you guys think. Ok?  
Thanks for reading :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)  
**


	11. Chapter 11

**It's so good to be back! I've missed this so damn much. The writing, the deadlines, and especially the reviews!**

**Serendipitylong:** I know right! I thought it was funny. MUM, YOUR CLOTHES! GRAY, YOUR CLOTHES! LYON, YOUR CLOTHES! Tee hee :) Thanks for the review~!

**Leoslady4ever:** Hehe, same here! Thank you so much. I really tried with this chapter. I wanted it to be perfect. Hehe, thanks so much for your continued support :D

**FallingStar93:** Well this chapter entails a bit reminiscing but nothing too graphic, there will probably be a lemon later on though and I'll let you know when that'll be, ok? Thanks for the review~!

**Psyka:** I know right, poor Gray :( Oh and don't worry, answers should be revealed in either this chapter or the next :) Thanks~!

**This chapter is not a lemon. Although it is reminiscing about some naughty stuff that went down between two certain people. The real action comes later on ;D  
So get excited!**

* * *

Chapter 11: Alcohol, hangovers and a road trip.

Gray's POV

My head was pounding.

I can't remember how much I drank last night but I'm sure that it was _way_ too much.

In fact, somehow I'd ended up someone's bed. And I had no idea who it belonged to.

If this was Laxus's bed he'd skin me alive for sure.

I gulped and looked around the room. There were posters of girl's in bikinis, striking seductive poses, all over the walls. A giant speaker system was in the corner next to a desk that was littered with numerous amounts of CD's and dirty magazines.

There was also a fair amount of clothes on the floor.

Male's clothing.

Clothes too big to fit my silver haired brother.

This meant that it really was Laxus's room. So I was a dead man.

Groaning, I shifted my weight so I could sit up against the wall behind the bed and massage my temples.

What I saw next was enough to send an electric shock right through my body and to my lower regions.

There, lying next to me was a girl.

Asleep.

Blonde.

And naked.

I almost did a doubt take when I realised who it was. The blonde hair and curvaceous body. It could only be one person.

Lucy.

Had we actually done it? Gone all the way?

Memories came flooding back to me as I remembered hints of last night's events.

* * *

_I could feel her ass grinding into my hips. I ground right back, pressing even harder into her body, wrapping my arms around her waist as we danced to the beat of the music.  
_

_We were hot and starting to glisten with sweat. Our bodies slid against each other as we moved in sync.  
_

_She stopped moving in time with the beat and turned around to face me, pressing her chest against mine and gripping my ass.  
_

_Then we were kissing, hot passionate and lustful.  
_

_Her hands entangled in my hair and my hands drifted down her back to cup her ass.  
_

_"Damn..." I whispered as she broke away, smirking at me.  
_

_We were in the middle of Cana's dining room table and I didn't even care as I dove back in for another sweet kiss.  
_

_Before long she was tugging at my shirt but I whispered in her ear that we need to go somewhere more private. So I picked her up and set her down on the ground before jumping down myself.  
_

_We took in our surroundings first.  
_

_Levy was straddling Gajeel on the kitchen bench as the two of them made out.  
_

_Natsu was on top of Lisanna on one couch, planting kisses all over her neck and collar.  
_

_Ren and Sherry had decided the couch wasn't good enough and were making out on the floor with Ren's back pressed against the abandoned couch as they took sips of vodka in between kisses.  
_

_Erza was still sitting on Jellal's lap, a bottle of gin in one hand whilst the other entangled itself in his blue hair. Their foreheads were pressed together as they spoke, their lips almost touching as Jellal ran a hand up the scarlet haired girl's leg and under the fabric of her skirt.  
_

_Mira had decided to shed her black leather jacket to reveal a strapless black midriff shirt that exposed her stomach and a large amount of her cleavage, while Freed had turned red in the face as her smiling face edged closer to his.  
_

_Shrieks of pleasure could be heard from the bed rooms of Cana and Juvia. No doubt Cana and Laxus as well as Juvia and Lyon had snuck off to do the nasty.  
_

_Elfman and Evergreen were keeping it more PG and stuck to flirting in the second longue room. One which was no occupied by two couples making out.  
_

_And Bickslow had at some point in time invited a group of about 5 girls who were clinging to him, begging for his attention.  
_

_This place was a mad house of couples, filled with the scent of sex and alcohol.  
_

_But none of that seemed to matter to us as we snuck off towards the closest bed room, i.e, Laxus's room.  
_

_As our clothes feel to the floor and our touches became more needy and lustful, the world outside the bed room was forgotten.  
_

_It didn't matter that Lucy barely remembered who I was.  
_

_It didn't matter that my arms were covered in scars.  
_

_And it didn't matter that we still had a long road ahead to get to full recovery.  
_

_We got lost in each other and every little painful detail of our lives was replaced by waves of passion and pleasure._

* * *

I felt Lucy shift besides me, getting more comfortable and yawning softly.

Since her back was to me she didn't even notice I was there.

She twisted her body so she was lying on her back. She must have caught sight of me out of the corner of her eye because she suddenly shot up, covering herself with the sheets.

"There's no way..." she whispered, looking at me with raised eye brows.

"It happened." I said bluntly, putting my hands in my lap.

"We actually did it..." she muttered to herself before a huge grin spread across her face.

"We really did." I smiled back at her warmly and she shifted closer to me, wrapping her arms around my waist and planting a soft kiss on my neck.

It was at this moment that a raging blonde decided to storm into his bed room.

His hair was a spiky mess and his headphones were, for once, not around his neck. His eyes were narrowed and angry.

Laxus was fuming.

"FULLBUSTER!" he shouted angrily, pointing an accusing finger at me and Lucy, "WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GUYS HAVE SEX IN MY BED?!"

Lucy shrieked loudly in my ear, making my splitting headache even worse as she covered her bare chest with the sheets once again and clung to my side.

Ugh. Hangovers are the worst.

"Look, Laxus, I didn't even know it was your room, we're sorry."

"Sorry, ain't gonna cut it this time Fullbuster. You idiots decided it'd be fun to go into someone's room without even caring whose it was so you could do the nasty. You're gonna pay!" Laxus growled as he stepped menacingly towards me.

I jumped out of bed, prepared to fight, unaware that I was completely naked in front of him.

"DUDE! YOUR CLOTHES! DO YOU HAVE NO SELF RESPECT?!" Laxus shouted in disgust but lunged at me anyway.

Lucy leapt off the bed, wrapping the sheets around her naked body and backed into the corner.

"Gray..." She watched Laxus and I wrestled each other, falling back onto the bed, cussing and screaming as loud as we could despite the fact that we were both hung over.

"How can you guys be screaming this early in the morning?! I know for a fact that you both drank your weight in liquor last night!" Cana scolded, walking in and taking in the scene before her, "Oh... Uh, am I interrupting something?"

Laxus was on top of my naked body, holding me down by the shoulders and smirking proudly at the fact that he had pinned me down. Although he leapt off of me as soon as Cana made her comment.

"NO! It's not like that I swear! The little shit fucked his girlfriend in _my_ bed, Cana, I'm pissed!" Laxus had his eye brows narrowed but he was silently begging the brunette before him to believe him.

"Well you two certainly have made a mess..." Cana looked a little awkward as she looked down at the exposed mattress which was covered in sticky stains of thick white liquid.

"I-I-I..." I tried to stutter something out but I couldn't find an excuse.

"Anyways, throw those sheets in the laundry. We're going on a road trip for a couple days since it's a long weekend!" Cana grinned excitedly.

"But it's like 9 in the morning!" Laxus complained.

"Oh hush. Laxus Dreyer, you will pack your things and we will go on this road trip and enjoy ourselves. Besides, there's going to be a shit load of alcohol."

At the mention of liquor, Laxus perked up and grinned before turning to us and frowning, "You two!" he pointed at us, "Get dressed and get the fuck out of my room!"

* * *

After Lucy and I had showered and gotten dressed, Lyon, Juvia, Laxus and Cana had packed their things and were ready to go.

We were going to use four cars.

Erza, Jellal, Sherry and Ren were travelling with Laxus in his big black Mercedes van.

Evergreen, Elfman, Freed and Bickslow were riding with Mirajane in her blue Kia Forte.

Levy, Gajeel and Lyon were going with Juvia in her little red Mazda2.

Lucy, Lisanna, Natsu and I were to be with Cana in her silver Ford Fusion.

Each of us made the rounds to each other's houses to where we quickly shoved a pile of things into a bag or suit case, locked up and got back in the car.

With one last stop at a 7eleven, we had a mountain of food, a bunch super sized slurpee's and a fuelled up car, we were off. Racing down the road to our destination was. Although we had no idea where we were heading since Cana, who was leading the other 3 cars behind us, hadn't told us yet.

* * *

It was 3 hours into the trip. Cana was still in the driver's seat with Natsu in the passenger seat, puking his guts up out the window.

Lucy sat in the middle with Lisanna on her right and me on the left. The two girls had fallen asleep on each other, with Lisanna's head on Lucy's shoulder and the blonde's head resting on top of hers. It was pretty cute.

"Gray...?" Cana looked at me through the rear-view mirror, her lips set into a grim line.

"Yeah?" I pulled my head phones out of my ears so I could hear her properly.

"Do you know how Lucy lost her memories?" She asked, her voice a little shaky.

"No. No one ever told me how it happened or why. All I know is that she has a vague outline of me from her childhood. Which is a massive improvement considering when we came across each other in the hospital, she had no clue who I was."

"W-would you like me to e-explain?" Cana was stuttering a little. It was strange since she was usually so outgoing and confident. This was not the Cana I knew.

"Only if you want to..." I gave her the option, knowing she was probably uncomfortable with the whole subject.

"Well..." Cana inhaled deeply before continuing, "I was driving my old car this one time. It was two years ago when I was third year in high school and Lucy was a first year. It was sunny and warm just like most days here in Magnolia. Lisanna was in the passenger seat with Levy in the middle of the back seat and Gajeel and Lucy on either side of her.  
This song came on the radio and we started singing along. It was one of our favourite songs and it was so catchy we couldn't really help ourselves. You know what song where it's like 'I go this feeling on the summer day when you were gone. I crashed my car into the bridge...?' That song?"

"Yeah, I've heard of it." I replied, unsure exactly where she was going with this.  
"Well we were all having so much fun singing along and being stupid that I took my eyes off the road for 2 seconds and just like in the song, I crashed my car into the bridge. Lisanna broke her arm, Levy went into shock and Gajeel and I had a few minor injuries. But Lucy must have it her when we crashed because the doctors told us that she had suffered a severe head injury and was in a medically induced coma. She didn't stay in the coma for long though. After about two weeks she woke up. We thought she was fine. She spoke to us the same way she always did and acted just like the normal, happy go lucky Lucy we've always know and loved. But one day, Laxus came to visit. She introduced herself to him and asked for his name. And at first Laxus thought she was just playing with him, but it was real. Besides everyone who was in the car crash, Lucy didn't remember everyone. Although she would gradually remember a few people from the past but very rarely. You're one of the lucky ones Gray, Lucy's starting to remember you." Cana smiled wearily at him through the rear-view mirror.

"Oh wow..." was all I could say as we sped down the free way.

I turned to Lucy and smiled sadly at her.

I tucked a stray strand of her sunshine coloured hair behind her ear and kissed her cheek, whispering in her ear:

_"Stay strong Lucy. I know you'll remember us one day. I believe in you.  
_

_I believe in us."_

* * *

**Well there we have it. That was chapter 11. This story is so easy to write. Whilst I always struggle with my other one's, this one has never been too hard to get around. I love this fic so much and I hope you guys have enjoyed it so far as well!  
Thanks! :3**

**LW / Wonder-chan :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Well here we go, it's the first fanfic of my Fairy Tail week! Woo, Chapter 12! Exciting! Thank you everyone who has favourite, followed and reviewed so far, you guys are my support and I can't thank you all enough :')**

**Dreamscometrue410:** Oh my god, hey! It's you :D Thank you so much for the review, I only just realised it was you after I went to write the story today and look over my reviews. Thank you! Good luck with your story by the way, you're doing an amazing job so far :)

**IYRGirl:** Hehe, they're quite adorable, ne? Hai, Laxus got so angry and I found it so fun it to write :D

**A name:** Yes indeed they did! Ahaha, they finally did it! Thank you so much for the review~!

**Psyka:** I know, I felt bad for Cana especially since she blames herself for the accident :( But thank you, your reviews are always appreciated :)

**Umi Ryuuzaki Fullbuster:** Hehe, yes they did! Ahaha, the where Lucy remembers is fast approaching! Get excited! XD

**Natpereira:** Thank you so much, I'm glad you liked it :)

**Well that's it for reviews! Now... Here we go, next chapter! :D  
Enjoy~!**

* * *

Chapter 12: When it becomes official

Cana's POV

Finally. He knows.

It's out in the open, I've finally mustered up the courage and now Gray knows about how Lucy lost her memories. I'm glad.

But there's one last thing I have to say...

"Say...Gray...?" I kept my eyes on the road as I drove, still cautious about my driving even though it's been 4 years.

"Hmm?" Gray looked away from my still sleeping cousin and I could see him looking at me through the rear view mirror.

I gave a quick glance around the car, making sure that Lucy, Lisanna and Natsu were all asleep, "Are you and Lucy...together?"

"WHAT?!" His eyes went wide and he shuffled back in his seat as far as he could, panting and ever so slightly sweating.

His face was bright red from embarrassment.

* * *

Lucy's POV

"Ahh! Awesome!" I sighed happily, breathing in the salty air and smiling.

I looked out at the vast expanse of ocean, taking in the beautiful blue waves washing over the golden sand of the beach.

We had finally made it.

Here we were, in a small beach town, 6 whole hours away from Magnolia on a spur of the moment road trip that had only occurred because we were all still slightly feeling the effects of last nights alcohol.

Honestly, I'm just glad we made it here in one piece and without the cops stopping us for a breath test. I suppose we're really lucky considering the police cars are usually everywhere during this public holiday.

But never the less, we came here to have fun. It was like part two of our little celebration for Gray.

_Gray..._

Oh god, Gray. I still can't totally comprehend exactly what we did last night.

After being attracted to him for no more than a week and a half, we'd shared our first kiss in the midst of a drunken passion. Then not even five minutes later we were lying together in Laxus's bed doing things I've never done before.

I try to live my life without any regrets, and this was indeed a great experience in my life. But the fact that I lost my virginity the same night I had my first kiss whist drunk off my ass seems a little well... Thoughtless.

I don't want to regret it since it was Gray I lost it to, but I can barely remember what happened between us. My first time was meant to be special. It was meant to go exactly as I planned it. It was meant to be perfect.

But I guess that's something that I've learned taking care of him over these past two weeks. Things rarely go the way you planned them and there's really nothing you can do to stop it.

I just wish I could remember.

Remember what it was like to be so close to him, to feel his skin burn against mine. But most of all... Just to remember him in general.

I want to remember what it was like in middle school, living next door to him and being his best friend. I want to remember so badly it hurts.

But of course, none of it would be worth it if Gray doesn't stick around.

Now that he's out of the hospital, after this little road trip, I may never see him again. One thing I'd like to know is: Are we a couple?

I mean, we kissed...a lot. And we had sex. I don't think that really counts as being a couple.

We haven't been on dates, he hasn't officially asked me to be his girlfriend and I don't even know if he really likes me all that much.

But those words...

_"Stay strong Lucy. I know you'll remember us one day. I believe in you.  
_

_I believe in us."_

He didn't seem to notice that I was waking up when he kissed my cheek and whispered in my ear. He believes in me. In us.

But what does he mean by us? Us as a couple? Or us as friends?

I don't know how to ask him about it. It's not like I can just go up to him and be like, "Hey Gray! What's up? I was just wondering... Are we a couple or not?"

That'd be so damn stupid.

"Hey! Lu-chan!" Levy called, poking me in the arm to get my attention and dragging me away from my inner ramblings, "We're going to the hotel now, hurry up!"

My bluenette best friend grinned at me before skipping off to capture the arm of the spiky haired boyfriend, who blushed from the sudden contact but kept the rough looking smirk on his face all the same.

I, like the rest of my friends, pulled a small suitcase from the boot of Cana's car. Sliding the handle upwards into its full length so I could tow it behind me.

In total there were 19 of us. We had a pretty big group.

Erza, Jellal, Levy, Gajeel, Freed, Mirajane, Natsu, Lisanna, Elfman, Evergreen, Bickslow, Laxus, Cana, Juvia, Lyon, Sherry, Ren, Gray and I.

We had finally arrived at the hotel.

* * *

Whilst took a look around the lobby of the hotel, the girls all gathered together to discuss our sleeping arrangements.

"I wanna sleep in the same room as Gajeel." Levy chimed, smiling shyly with a heavy blush coating her cheeks.

"Nuh uh, no way. There's not gonna be any co-ed shit in the hotel. You wanna get down and dirty, you do it where the nice people of this hotel can't hear your screaming." Cana scolded and Levy backed down, retreating Gajeel's side and holding his hand gently whilst playing with his fingers.

"Well if that's how you feel about it Cana, then why don't we get one of those big rooms where they have a wall between two rooms and a door connecting them. This way, we can have a girl's side and a boys side and if we really need something from the guys or vice versa, we can use the door." Lisanna suggested.

"Yeah, that sounds good. Ok, it's settled!" Erza grinned before calling the boys over.

We told them our plan and as expected, there was a lot of protesting from the male side of our group. Boy's really do think with their dicks, I swear.

But a glare from our scarlet haired beauty was enough to shut them up once and for all as Mirajane and Juvia made their way over to the front desk to arrange our rooms.

Two minutes later they came back with huge smiles on their faces as they held up a large amount of room keys, handing one to each individual within the group.

The pair led the way up the stairs -since there were too many of us to take the elevator at once- and up to our rooms.

Mira bought us all into the boy's side first before opening the door separating the two rooms and ushering us inside.

Laxus, Lyon, Natsu, Jellal, Freed, Bickslow, Gajeel, Elfman, Ren and Gray were to stay in the boys side and not cross the border under any circumstances unless they had an extremely good reason.

Whereas Lisanna, Erza, Mira, Evergreen, Sherry, Levy, Juvia, Cana and I were supposed to stay on the girls side. But unlike the boys, we were allowed free reign between both rooms.

Taking a look around, the place actually wasn't so bad.

There were 10 identical single beds in the room, 5 on the right and 5 on the left. There was a little kitchen hidden behind the bedroom section, then a bathroom and then a laundry. The place was fairly small, but it would do. It wasn't like we were going to be here all that often anyway.

I smiled as the girls began to choose which bed they would sleep in and unpack their stuff.

Mira ran to the door separating the boys from the girls, shouting, "You boys unpack quickly. We're leaving for the beach in an hour and a half!"

Jellal appeared in the doorway, giving a wave at Erza before asking, "But why? We could easily get dressed and grab our beach stuff in 15 minutes. Why an hour and a half?"

"Because," Mira replied, "We need some girl time! We've all got heaps to talk about and I'm sure you boys could find something to do to entertain yourselves."

And with that, the blue eyed beauty turned on her heel, waves of white hair swirling around her shoulders.

"Ok girls, gather round!" She called and our the female side of our group formed a rough circle in the centre of the room, "We have a lot to discuss, ok? A whole lot of stuff went down last night and I gotta know the details!" Mirajane was grinning happily, eager for some gossip.

"What'd you mean, Mira?" Levy asked, cocking her head to the side, "What kind of details?"

"Oh, you know. All the details! Who hooked up with who!" Mira was getting real excited by this point.

"Ahh, I get it," Erza commented, "You're the same as ever Mira."

The oldest Strauss giggled girlishly and nodded.

"Well then, if that's how you wanna play it," Cana grinned evilly, "Why don't you go first then Mirajane?"

The white haired girl's face suddenly flushed red in embarrassment, "W-well... I-I-I..."

"C'mon Mira~" I encouraged, a sly smile playing on my lips, "If you want us to reveal our secrets, you gotta go first."

"Oh fine!" She huffed, her shoulders drooping as she sighed in defeat, "I-I-I hooked up with Freed."

"Tee hee," Lisanna giggled, "Saw that coming from a mile away Nee-chan. Did you's go all the way?"

"What? No!" Mira gushed, "Freed's too much of a gentleman and plus we'd only really just started off our relationship that day anyways. It wouldn't be very appropriate."

Hearing Mirajane say that made me swallow nervously. Isn't that exactly what Gray and I had done? Had sex the same day our 'relationship' started?

"Ok! Now I get to choose who goes next!" Mira smirked, waving her finger around in the air before it landed on Cana, "Tell me Miss Cana, what was it that was making you shriek so loudly with pleasure last night?"

Now it was time for Cana's face to turn bright red as she muttered the name of her lover, "L-L-Laxus..." She whispered, her words barely audible.

This little game of Mira's was kind of scaring me. I didn't want to tell everyone here that I'd slept with Gray. That'd just be weird!

But thankfully, I was saved by a knock on the door.

And who else could it be but Gray. Of course he'd show up now.

Just seeing his handsome face and raven hair made me smile happily.

"L-Lucy...Could I speak with you for a second?" He mumbled, digging his hands deep into his pockets and blushing ever so slightly.

The group of girls made 'ooh' sounds as I stood up and met him at the doorway, "Of course." I smiled up at him, letting him take my hand and lead me away from our hotel room until we were standing at the top of the stairs we'd climbed to get here.

"So what was it you wanted to talk about?" I asked, generally interested.

"Well... You see, it's more of a question actually." He cast his eyes down at his shoes, trying to hide the growing redness in his cheeks with his dark hair.

"Oh?" I cocked my head to the side.

"I was wondering..." He paused, lifted his head up and looked me right in the eyes, "Would you please be my girlfriend?!" He almost shouted the question as he stared intensely into my chocolate coloured orbs.

He was so cute like that. Biting his lower lip whilst his cheeks glowed red. His dark eyes were hopeful and scared.

I smiled, tucking a few stray strands of my blonde hair behind my ears, pausing for affect as I cast my eyes downwards before mumbling, "Of course."

* * *

Gray's POV

I did it. Lucy's officially my girlfriend. I should be the happiest guy in the world.

My heart is still pounding and my cheeks are still flushed, but I have this sinking feeling.

I feel... No, I know that somehow I'm going to find a way to screw this up. I'll end up doing something stupid and it'll all be over. The girl of my dreams will be gone.

I should have had the most amazing day. Lucy was now my girlfriend and I'd just spent the day at the beach with all my friends. But something was dragging me down.

I lay wide awake in my bed, the sheets pulled up to my chin, just thinking of ways I could screw up our newly formed relationship.

I simply couldn't sit still anymore.

I got up and made my way to the tiny kitchen to pour myself a glass of water.

I knew why these negative thoughts were popping up again.

After the party I'd forgotten something. Something very important.

My medication.

They'd had me on anti-depressants and anti-anxieties for over a week during my stay at the hospital. After that they gave me two yellow bottles full of medication. One for my depression, the other for my anxiety. I was supposed to take them twice a day. Once in the morning and then again at night.

And I'd forgotten to take them when I got back from the hospital. Then I'd forgotten them again in the morning when I woke up. And once again, I screwed up by forgetting to take them with me on this trip.

So I wouldn't have my meds for three whole days.

And the downward spiral had already begun. I was losing control.

On the kitchen bench was a knife block with five different knives in them.

Before I knew what was happening, before I could stop myself, I was reaching for the black coloured handle of the biggest knife in the block.

I drew it from its slot, letting the moonlight from the window shine down and reflect off the pretty silver of the blade.

This time I pulled up my boxer shorts to reveal the smooth, unmarred skin of my upper thigh. Here would be a lot safer than my arms. This way no one would see the damage.

Without even thinking about what could happen, I slid the sharp silver across my bare thigh, over and over till there were over 20 slash marks on just one leg.

I moved to my other leg, copying my actions from only moments ago.

It felt good.

After not being able to cut for what seemed like forever, it was pretty much a relief to be able to start again.

The open wounds on my now cut up legs. The blood trickling down my flesh. That sensation of release. These feelings had already resurfaced.

It was good to finally hurt myself in return for causing all my friends so much pain.

I know for a fact that Lyon and Juvia did not want to visit me at the hospital. They didn't want to come to m party or on this road trip. They don't want anything to do with me.

Because it's me, I'm stupid and worthless and a loser.

I was wallowing in self pity when a clear female voice echoed lightly through the depressing air of the kitchen.

"Gray?"

* * *

**Ooh, who could it be? Which one? Hehe, gotta wait till chapter 13 to find out!  
Thank you guys so much for reading this and don't forget to leave me a review, kay? Do that and I'll love you forever. :)**

**LW / Wonder-chan**


	13. Chapter 13

**Well here we go, another chapter is up! I'm really quite nervous about this one for some reason. I don't know why. Please don't hate me!  
Yes, I know. It's been like 2 months. I'm so very, very so sorry. You have no idea how sorry I am. There are 2 reasons for this. 1, writer's block. 2, my relationship.  
I literally haven't been able to write for weeks due to a major writer's block. There was just no inspiration flowing whatsoever. Also, this incredibly sweet guy I've been crushing on for ages asked me out and we've been dating for a little while and that's been taking up most of my writing time. But anyways, you guys don't want to hear about my about my life...  
Thank you to everyone who has reviewed followed and added this story to their favourites. You guys are what keep me going.  
All I have to say in reply to the reviews is I'm so incredibly sorry, please forgive me! I know you guys were all so excited now that Gray and Lucy are a couple and you all really wanted to know who it was that found him cutting. I'm so so so sorry! The new chapter is here and I hope you enjoy it. :)**

* * *

Chapter 13: Clarity.

* * *

Gray's POV

"Gray?"

The familiar female voice was all too clear in the silence that came along after all our friends had fallen asleep.

I felt the knife in my hand slip, falling haphazardly through the air before clattering to the ground loudly and narrowly missing my feet, although I was in too much shock to care. The sound was enough to make the lone figure behind me flinch as she realised what I was doing to myself.

By now she must have seen the blood trickling down my leg.

But why was she over here in the boy's side? Her of all people. She was not someone who woke up in the middle of the night and couldn't get back to sleep. Over all the years that we've known each other, she has always been a deep sleeper.

"Juvia." That was all I could manage to say as I was still in a state of shock that she had been the one to find me like this.

How was she going to react?

I was pretty damn sure that she despised me. After all, she'd made that pretty clear back in middle school when she had screamed at me over mine and Lucy's friendship.

I closed my eyes, clenching my fists by my side as I turned around to face her.

I found it so difficult to open my eyes back up again. I didn't want to see the hatred she harboured for me in her cobalt eyes. I'm sick of feeling hated and unwanted. I didn't want to see her expression of mocking anymore than I wanted Lucy to remain in her memory challenged state. Yet I opened my eyes to meet hers.

I knew I was shaking when I looked down into her deep blue eyes. I couldn't help it. I didn't want to suffer under her judgement. I didn't want to hear her taunting.

The blue haired woman was clad in a tiny blue shorts and black t-shirt that was way too big for her. I assumed it was my brothers. Her hand rested just in front of her mouth. She seemed unsure of what exactly to do.

Her mouth was set in a firm line, not happy, yet not upset either. She stared at me, watching the blood drip down my legs and trying to read the emotions in my eyes. For my sake I seriously hoped that she couldn't tell how absolutely terrified of her I was.

"Gray..." She started again, moving her hand away from her lips as she took a single step towards me, "You're such an idiot."

The bluenette narrowed her eyebrows at me and the corners of her mouth twisted downwards into a disapproving scowl.

Well here we go. The ridicule was about to begin.

"Juvia..." I started but she cut me off by holding her hand up, indicating that I should stop talking.

She placed a hand on her waist before cocking her hip to the side. She leered at me, growing more and more intimidating by the minute, despite the fact that she was dressed in her pyjamas and her wavy locks were tousled into a bed head.

I could feel myself starting to sweat. Droplets of salty liquid were beading across my forehead. That's just how nervous I was under the intensity of her cobalt gaze.

"You have a lot of people who care about you and want you to get better yet you're still hurting yourself. Why the do you think we all came out here? Despite what happened in the past, Lyon and I still came to visit you in the hospital, we partied at your house to celebrate your release and now everyone is finally back together and you're doing something like this. Ultimately, after much persuasion from Cana and Laxus, we decided that what happened to Ur, and what happened between us in middle school, none of it was your fault. We just wanted everything to go back to the way it used to be. We wanted to see you smile again. Gray, Lyon and I... We really do care about you."

I was stunned to say the least. Juvia, who had hated me for years, my brother, you had resented me for the death of our mother figure, they really did seem to care after all.

"T-thank you...Juvia." I mumbled quietly, to which she responded with a quick nod.

"Don't even worry about it. Now, we have to hurry up and patch those wounds of yours before they make a mess on the floor." She turned towards one of the many cupboards within the kitchen whilst I bent down to pick up the bloodied knife on the floor.

The bluenette searched through the cupboards until she found what she was looking for.

After I had washed and dried the sharp, silver piece of cutlery, she instructed me to sit down in the dining room so she could bandage my leg.

As she wrapped the white fabric over the fresh cuts, she spoke up, "You know, it's not really any of my business, but even though you and Lucy are dating now, I'm assuming that you don't want me to tell her about this?"

My lips parted slightly in thought. I wasn't sure I should go around telling Lucy about this. She was always worried about me and I hated seeing her so upset over my stupid self destruction.

I didn't have a chance to reply though since Juvia had already finished bandaging my leg and was now heading towards the doorway leading back to the girl's room.

Right as she was about to exit, the blue haired woman turned to me, "Take care of her Gray, she truly cares for you and would do pretty much anything to make you happy. Remember that." And with that, she left, closing the door behind her before I could even process what had just happened.

* * *

Lucy's POV

I couldn't stop.

I couldn't stop this flood of emotion and tears.

Some time during the middle of the night I had woken up thirsty and gotten up to fetch myself a glass of water.

It was at this time that I heard a quiet conversation on the guy's side of the room between two people, a man and a woman.

The woman's voice belonged to Juvia so I assumed that she was talking to Lyon at first. But for some reason something felt off.

I found myself creeping closer to the door separating the guys and girl's rooms.

"Juvia." The was all the man said.

But that was all I needed. One word and I instantly knew who was on the other side of the door.

_Gray..._

I had listened in on their conversation, uncaring about respect and privacy. I was curious as to what he could possibly be talking about with his brother's girlfriend.

What I had heard shocked me.

I crept through the doorway and peered around the corner to take in a horrific sight.

The blue haired woman stood with her hands clenched by her sides, her head down and her hourglass frame trembling. Whereas Gray stood opposite her, blood trickling down his legs, his cobalt orbs wide and mouth hanging open.

I dashed across through the open space to hide behind a wall on the other side of the room. This way, when Juvia left, I wouldn't be discovered.

I'd heard and seen enough to know what was going on.

Gray had cut himself once again; Juvia had stumbled upon the scene and lectured him about how much everyone cares for him. Gray was in shock because he honestly didn't think that was possible.

I wasn't the one to help him this time.

So now I'm lying in his bed, crying my eyes out as I wait for the raven haired man to return.

Whilst I sobbed and waited, I began to notice things about the boys' side of the room.

Where the girl's beds were all jammed into the one room, the boys beds were all separated by a series of walls, making it so their room resembled a maze.

For that, I was glad.

This meant that people like Bickslow and Laxus wouldn't tease me about being in Gray's bed at such a late hour of the night.

It didn't however help my seemingly endless stream of tears that were flowing from my eyes.

I pulled the covers up to my chin, wrapping myself in the warmth that resided there.

Gray had obviously been sleeping here very recently as it was still warm. Even though we hadn't been here long, the sheets had already begun to smell like him.

He smelt like sea spray and apples. An odd combination that was strangely enticing. The scent, strangely enough, made me miss him, despite the fact that he wasn't really that far away.

He was only in the kitchen; I could easily get up and walk to him.

But I really didn't want to get up out of his bed. Getting up meant leaving behind his scent and for a few mere moments I would be completely devoid of anything that connected me to him.

So I had no choice but to lie here and wait whilst silently crying into his pillow.

Why was I even crying?

Because he'd hurt himself again. Someone who was dear to me was hurting themselves which in turn made my heart ache painfully.

This overwhelming sorrow was almost enough to make me understand how Gray was able to take a blade to his skin.

I suppose when everything goes to shit in your life it's like you have no other way out. The anguish and sorrow of life becomes too much that everything seems to blur and becomes numb. And when you're so very numb and empty inside you'd give almost anything to feel again.

Maybe that's how it works. Maybe that's what goes on in Gray's mind when he –

"Lucy?"

I jolted suddenly, making a strange, high-pitched noise that vaguely resembled a squeal. Gray was back, standing over his bed and staring down at me with a slightly worried look in his eyes.

"Lucy?" He repeated, bending down to brush golden strand out of my eyes, most likely so he could see me properly.

He must have noticed my tears because his mouth formed a small 'o' before setting into a frown of sadness.

The raven haired man pulled the covers away from my body and climbed into bed with me before pulling them back to cover the two of us.

He pulled my close so that my body was pressed firmly against him before wiping the tears from my eyes and smoothing my hair back gently.

I buried my face into his chest and he just held me tight for what seemed like an eternity.

When I had finally calmed down enough, I pulled away so I could look him in the eyes.

My voice trembled as I spoke but gradually I managed to get the words out, "G-Gray... Y-You did it ag-g-gain..."

It took a while for my words to sink in, for him to really understand what I was trying to say.

"Did you hear the conversation between Juvia and I?" He asked as his eyes glazed slightly, indicating that he was thinking deeply about the situation.

My only reply was a single nod.

"I see..." was all he said before giving off a very loud, tired-of-life, sigh.

We lay there for a while, not saying anything. Simply being.

I have no record of the precise amount of time that we spent like this, wrapped up under the sheets, holding each other. And whilst the initial moment was sad, it was still nice to be like this with him.

To feel warm and safe in his arms, to listen to his rhythmic sound of his heart and feel his cool breath on my cheek. It was pleasant and by far the most relaxed I've felt in a long time, despite the explosion of tears beforehand.

But of course I wasn't about to let go of what he had done to himself. I wanted him to tell me why, to trust me and be honest with me.

"Gray," I whispered, "Why?"

"Hmm? Why? Do you mean why did I cut myself again?" He asked, trying to be casual about it, although he was clearing uncomfortable with this discussion topic.

I nodded.

"Well I suppose I could blame it on the fact that I forgot to bring my meds with me on this trip but that's probably not right. I could list a whole lot of reasons. There are things that have happened to me in the past that changed me for the worst. But I don't know if I'm ready to go back over those things yet. And if I can't look back on them, then I'm sorry but I doubt that I could share them with someone else. Even if it's you of all people, Lucy, I just can't. I'm so sorry."

Although slightly disappointed, Gray's reasons for not wanting to share his painful past seemed valid. I didn't want to push him for answers or force him to share something he wasn't yet comfortable for ready to share so I opted for telling him: "Sure, that's fine. Maybe some other time." And giving him what I hoped was a sweet, reassuring smile.

"Thanks Luce. I appreciate it." He smiled back at me, a genuine smile that was so lovely I almost wanted to start crying again.

This was a rare occasion to find him smiling like this, it made me happy.

And just to prove how appreciative he really was, he tilted my head up and gazed lovingly into my chocolate orbs before swooping down and capturing my lips in a long, heart-felt kiss.

I was left, dazed and a little giddy by the end of it, but nevertheless I found myself falling asleep in his arms.

I knew I should probably go back to my own room for if I didn't I would probably wake up to another round of Laxus screaming about us having sex again, despite the pure innocence of this situation.

But I was simply too tired and too happy to be bothered leaving.

Besides, I liked it better here, pressed up against the chest of my boyfriend, encircling by his warm, tender embrace. It was so much better than lying back in the girls side where I would be cold and alone with Cana's snoring and Mirajane whispering gossip to keep everyone awake.

It's a bit weird, but it's only the first day and already I feel as if I'm falling.

Falling in love.

* * *

**Read and Review please! I'll try to update more frequently ok? Just please don't hate me :)**

**L/W / Wonder-chan xx**


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